All-Star Advice On Slacking Cp

[cheermom0322]

Hi everyone. I'm looking for some advice on how I can get my CP motivated at cheer. We moved to a new gym this season and she rocked it at tryouts. She also kept up her work ethic over the summer. All of a sudden she's started giving up. She went from basing the biggest senior flyer (at 11 years old) to not even being able to keep up a 7 year old. She's become lazy and just doesn't seem to care. We're going to rethink Allstar cheer next season but for now we're committed. Any advice on what we can do to motivate her to start working hard again?


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[CheerBank]

Hi everyone. I'm looking for some advice on how I can get my CP motivated at cheer. We moved to a new gym this season and she rocked it at tryouts. She also kept up her work ethic over the summer. All of a sudden she's started giving up. She went from basing the biggest senior flyer (at 11 years old) to not even being able to keep up a 7 year old. She's become lazy and just doesn't seem to care. We're going to rethink Allstar cheer next season but for now we're committed. Any advice on what we can do to motivate her to start working hard again?


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She is 11 and on a senior team? What is the reasoning behind that?

 

[retiredl5cheer]

Have you chatted with her coach? Any idea on what's going on inside practice that has caused this shift?

 

[cheermom0322]

She is 11 and on a senior team? What is the reasoning behind that?

No. During tryouts she based a senior flyer and did amazing.


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[cheermom0322]

Have you chatted with her coach? Any idea on what's going on inside practice that has caused this shift?

We're meeting with the coach tomorrow and I'm chatting with my daughter more about it tonight. I have a feeling this will be the last year cheering but we've already made a commitment.


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[SL&AM]

Hi everyone. I'm looking for some advice on how I can get my CP motivated at cheer. We moved to a new gym this season and she rocked it at tryouts. She also kept up her work ethic over the summer. All of a sudden she's started giving up. She went from basing the biggest senior flyer (at 11 years old) to not even being able to keep up a 7 year old. She's become lazy and just doesn't seem to care. We're going to rethink Allstar cheer next season but for now we're committed. Any advice on what we can do to motivate her to start working hard again?


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I find getting the root of the issue is the first step in figuring out why her attitude has changed. My older went from loving cheer and putting in the work every second she could to gradually asking to go less and less and eventually crying when we got to the parking lot. That only lasted a week before I pulled her. In her case, there were team personality issues alongside bullying issues. I'm not saying this is what is happening for your kiddo, but if there is any team drama it could effect her attitude towards her team.

 

[CheerBank]

No. During tryouts she based a senior flyer and did amazing.


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Thanks for clarifying - if you said she was on a senior team I would have looked at the age differences first to see if maybe socially she was having difficulties that were affecting everything else. 11 can be a tough age. I hope talking to your daughter and the coach will help you figure out what is going on. Best of luck!

 

[SparkleSpankies]

Maybe cheer isn't her thing anymore, people change. With that being said, I would definitely try and get down to the root cause as there may be additional underlying issues.

 

[cachoi]

Also look at her new teammates. Is she hanging around girls who have the minimum skills to be on the team who don't push to go to every open gym, clinic or class? Remind her of her long term goals. I slacked off my senior year after an injury, gave up on cheering in college and I still really regret it.

 

[DonnaM]

Is she at the old end of her team? The fact that she worked hard when trying out with seniors, but is struggling with a 7 yr old makes me think this might be the case, and that can be a hard dynamic. CP has had the experience of being basically ignored because she was going to do what she was supposed to do while younger kids got a lot of attention because they'd get off task otherwise, and it's hard to stay motivated in that kind of situation. That was actually why we moved tumbling to the gym she now cheers at.

This goes double if her skills/experience level are also higher than many on her team.

 

[OldskoolKYcheercoach]

Avoid use of the word lazy. It has a negative connotation and immediately puts athletes who genuinely care on the defensive.

If you use the word lazy, the phrase "not as much effort", or similar phrases when you approach her, your conversation will be on a slow train to nowhere.

You only get one shot at this. Tell her you've noticed that she doesn't seem as happy to go to cheer anymore and as a parent you just want to know if something is bothering her. Any thing you say beyond that will put her on defense as well. In her mind, you are parent, not coach. That's all you're allowed to be.

One thing that comes to mind at 11, is if she is having body image issues. Kids start that mess younger these days than they did in the past. Don't be surprised to find out that's the cause.

 

[twincheermom]

We're meeting with the coach tomorrow and I'm chatting with my daughter more about it tonight. I have a feeling this will be the last year cheering but we've already made a commitment.


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When you say "made the commitment", do you mean financially or in terms of not letting the team down? When do your comps start? What would happen now if you walked away? The season is long as it is, and if she's not committed now, what will it be like for her and the rest of the team if she has to make it to April or May and her heart isn't really in it? Sometimes, although initially difficult for the team to redo a routine, in the long run it could be the best for everyone involved. Or...after meeting with her coach, you all can get to the bottom of what is going on. I hope that everything works out.

 

[SthrnCheerMom]

Until you get to the root cause of this sudden change, you can't determine what will motivate her.

 

[cupieqt]

Until you get to the root cause of this sudden change, you can't determine what will motivate her.

Bingo.

And building on that, ask her straight up to tell you why she isn't interested anymore. No judgement and no interruptions. If she can't give you a solid reason like "it's not fun because we just stand around a lot" or "the girls on my team act like babies and they don't listen", then there's more to it than she can pin down. And that's when you start looking at other people possibly tearing her down. Sometimes bullies are subtle. Sometimes it's the coach.

But no matter what is going down, when kids that were on fire 3 months ago suddenly cool off, that means they're not having fun anymore and that's something that needs to be looked into.

 

[naaans]

She went from basing the biggest senior flyer (at 11 years old) to not even being able to keep up a 7 year old.


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...it's a lot easier to base a skilled senior who knows how to fly vs a 7 year old who may be brand new at flying and doesn't know how to distribute her weight.

Did you have any luck tonight with your daughter?


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