All-Star Cheer Moms or Dads . . . Who's Out There?

[WyldWon]

Hi, I'm Karanja and my daughter has been cheering for 6 years (7 if you count pop warner). Currently, she cheers for Cheer Extreme Allstars in K'ville, NC and is on their Junior Elite and Junior Coed Elite teams. We've been a CEA family for 5 years now. Her favorite things about cheering for CEA is backing the fierce stunts, and dancing - the sicker the better! She just started high school this year and is learning how to juggle her course load, tumbling and practices. I'm proud of her! Years ago, I made a fluffy hat thinking that it would embarrass her (that's a parent's job, after all), but she thought it was cool, and now, we can't go to any competition without it! She and her friends think it's good luck! So, I'm the Teal Top Hat Lady at competitions...*sigh* ;-P

Were you in Indy this weekend? I was sitting near a woman with a fuzzy hat and thought it was the coolest thing...I was in watching the Senior 5 divisions...was that you???

 

[cheerparentillinois]

Hi Im Katie, my daughter started in gymnastics (4-5yrs) and progressed to cheer as she didnt want to be in gym 4hrs a day 5 days a week, joined a newly started all star program and after 3yrs finally was sick and tired of the coach and her lack of skills and her behavior and we decided to join Allstar Rebels which was about 45 minutes away, best thing she did!

 

[cheerparentillinois]

Oh and I saved that Cheer Parent progression, there is two parts heres the first:


Well I have a philosophy on psycho cheer moms, especially those who start with very young children. Hear me out:

First year: first year cp is clueless, and mom is clueless. It's all fun and games. The novelty comes from wearing a cheerleading uniform at a young age and getting to wear big glittery bows and glittery makeup with bright lipstick. Mom has no clue about the sport, has no concept of what a scoresheet is, what level play is, what body positions are, and is pretty oblivious to other gyms in the area because she chose the one right down the street from her house. The focus is not on winning at all.....all concern is placed on her own cp and whether or not she will make it through the routine without running off the floor crying or having to go pee pee.

Second year: cp has gained some skills, and mom is starting to learn a little. Mom understands a little about level play and is so tickled that her cp has learned some skill. However, all cp's friends are learning some skill too and the worry sets in about her cp keeping up, or falling behind. Mom also starts to notice that other gyms in the area might have teams that are good and starts to question whether or not this gym is the BEST gym around. She now knows cp will make it through a routine, and starts to crave winning.

Third year: PEAK PYSCHO YEAR: cp has gained more skills, and mom is excited but still nervous because some of cp's friends have gained more skills. Mom gets hard on cp, putting pressure on her to "get better" tumbling, jumps, body positions, etc. Mom is starting to understand score sheets, now knows how to look up performance orders like a pro, stalk you tube and picture websites to see what her cp's team is up against. She is full flegged into having her cp be on a winning team! Now the mom knows all the weaknesses of her cp's gym, and will take every opportunity to point out those weaknesses!! Talk about changing gyms is rampant, unless cp's gym has a winning record. Even if it does there will still be issues mom needs to complain about and the thoughts about whether the grass is greener at the other gyms sometimes wins out and they move. Complaints about other kids, coaches, methods, other parents, etc is at it's peak!!!

Fourth year: Mom is still psycho, but cp is progressing even more and that is enough to keep mom happy, especially if there was a gym change. Mom is into full flegged cheer mania!! She wants that win bad!!! Relationships with other cheer moms have developed, even moms from other gyms. She may still be putting tons of pressure on cp to fix this and that, get this and that etc.

Fifth year: Mom still has hidden anxiety but has stopped telling everyone about it. She has met some other 3rd year psycho moms and realize how insanely idiotic they act. She has come to terms with her own cp's level and has started taking away the pressures, but still quietly encourages improvement. She enjoys some quiet conversation with other 4+ year cheer moms. She fully understands by now what it takes to win, and has accepted that kids develop in different stages. She also understands now that kids will have strengths and weaknesses, including her own cp, and they can all contribute to a team beautifully.

Sixth year: Mom has settled nicely into a happy group of other veteran moms and laughs out loud at the 3rd year moms. She still wants the win bad, but she realizes now that winning is not everything. She has found a peace with her cp, and gives her the tools she needs to succeed, but no longer pushes so hard. This peace continues through the rest of cp's cheer career.

Now obviously there are exceptions, and lots of them. But I have seen this pattern from soooo many moms. Too bad we can't go from 1st year to 6th year and skip the years in between I guess my advice is, if you enjoy her as a friend, be patient and she will settle back down. If you don't think you can wait a year or two, cut her loose until she's a 5th year mom...haha.

 

[cheerparentillinois]

Heres the 2nd:


I also passed on the first five years post, and a friend decided to complete the remaining years for veteran cheer parents with 10 plus years (tongue in check, well, a little).

Here 'tis....

Year 5; you know where every bar and liquor store is within walking distance of every hotel in any major US city that hosts a competition. You go and watch all the teams from your program that you reasonably can, and you watch your daughter and say 'YAY' or "Whatever, we'll see what happens next competition". You stay through the last awards ceremony so the coach will think you are a good 'team player'.

Year 6; Year 5 PLUS you know which of those bars will allow your children to accompany you. You go to the venue at times that allow you to watch your daughter, and your friends' daughters, expect them to win and are happy if none of them fall. You stay at the venue through awards for your daughter's level.

Year 7; You learn how to smuggle booze in your luggage because you can no longer afford to drink in bars and the coaches have caught on to the fact that your kids are "never around" after 5 PM. You go to the venue only when you darn well have to. You ask the woman next to you in preferred seating "how did my kid do, anyway?" since your eyesight is now failing and your attention span is weak. You stay only as long as you have other friends stuck there and/or you have seen your own kids' awards. Whichever ends last.

Year 8; You add a portable blender and plastic glasses to your baggage because your friends now know it's your room where the REAL competition is 'happening'. You send your daughter to the venue with her friends and a 'responsible' adult while you 'finish getting ready'. Your daughter has figured out that she can say "Mom, you don't have a clue what you are talking about" without getting backhanded or grounded, when you comment on her teams' performance. So you no longer have to even pretend to notice what is happening with anyone but her on the mat so her and you can chat about it later. See Year 7 for when you can leave.

Year 9; You start organizing the room party and taking collections for booze in advance of the trip. Since your daughter is Level 5 and traveling all over God's Green Earth for a bid, and you have to pay for a trip to Worlds when you really hate Disney, you can no longer afford to foot the bill for all the booze. You hand your daughter a $20 bill and send her to the venue with her friends, a bunch of boys and no adult. You show up 3.5 minutes before they are scheduled to perform and pray they are not running ahead of schedule (ha ha HA ha ha HA). Immediately after awards you tell your friends "meet you back at my room" and leave.

Years 10-14 - I don't recall. I spent those entire weekends on auto-pilot. However, you now belong to a cheer board where everyone else tells you what happened and someone is always happy to tell you what you should think. From there on in, easy.
　
　
　
　
　

 

[SharkDad]

That's awesome. A lot of people have been looking for that. We have a bunch of visitors at the new board. Everyone stop by and check it out!

 

[ctgatormom]

Hi!! Im Yvette... my cp is 11 and has been cheering for about 6 years. She started at some smaller local teams that are no longer around..She is now at Cheer Tyme and is in her second season there!! She loves it and is on a Youth and a Junior team

 

[Brenner]

Hi I am Brenner
I am not new to the boards.

I am the owner of All Star One in southern NJ for the past 4 years and owned Victory All Stars for 6 years before that.
I have 3 children, two girls and a boy. My oldest daughter is now 20, attends college and works at my gym. My middle daughter is 18 and cheers for the University of Maryland, and my son. is 17 years old and decided to start cheering 8 months ago.

 

[ctgatormom]

Hi I am Brenner
I am not new to the boards.

I am the owner of All Star One in southern NJ for the past 4 years and owned Victory All Stars for 6 years before that.
I have 3 children, two girls and a boy. My oldest daughter is now 20, attends college and works at my gym. My middle daughter is 18 and cheers for the University of Maryland, and my son. is 17 years old and decided to start cheering 8 months ago.

Love UMD!!!! Go Terps

 

[Mo-Lissa]

My name is Melissa
My daughters have been in cheerleading since 1995...wow really??!?! My oldest has aged off, she did 2 years pop warner, and 10 years with Wilmington Allstars. My youngest is 14 now and raised as a gym rat. She started with Wilmington Allstars and now cheers for Cheer Infinity. (same coach though) Love the Cheer Parent Progression Chart, so true!!!!!

 

[cheer36mom]

my name is carla
my cp cheers at keystone extreme
second year on small senior 4
this is my cp's 5th year in all star cheer
my cp is eleven years old

 

[cheer36mom]

my name is carla
my cp cheers at keystone extreme
second year on small senior 4
this is my cp's 5th year in all star cheer
my cp is eleven years old

tried to edit my post ran out of time
i also have a 5yr old cp
2nd year in allstar and 2nd year on tiny level 1

 

[angelndscz]

Hi, I'm Karen.
My CP is 7 and cheers at Stars Athletics, Tampa FL on Youth 2.
She cheered 2 previous seasons at another Tampa All-Star gym (Tiny 1 and Mini 2).
Before that she did rec cheer for her brother's flag football team (age 3 & 4).

I also have 3 sons who are 9, 16, and 18. They do not cheer but play or have played football, baseball, ice hockey, and lacrosse.

 

[FamUsM0m]

Oh and I saved that Cheer Parent progression, there is two parts heres the first:


Well I have a philosophy on psycho cheer moms, especially those who start with very young children. Hear me out:

First year: first year cp is clueless, and mom is clueless. It's all fun and games. The novelty comes from wearing a cheerleading uniform at a young age and getting to wear big glittery bows and glittery makeup with bright lipstick. Mom has no clue about the sport, has no concept of what a scoresheet is, what level play is, what body positions are, and is pretty oblivious to other gyms in the area because she chose the one right down the street from her house. The focus is not on winning at all.....all concern is placed on her own cp and whether or not she will make it through the routine without running off the floor crying or having to go pee pee.

Second year: cp has gained some skills, and mom is starting to learn a little. Mom understands a little about level play and is so tickled that her cp has learned some skill. However, all cp's friends are learning some skill too and the worry sets in about her cp keeping up, or falling behind. Mom also starts to notice that other gyms in the area might have teams that are good and starts to question whether or not this gym is the BEST gym around. She now knows cp will make it through a routine, and starts to crave winning.

Third year: PEAK PYSCHO YEAR: cp has gained more skills, and mom is excited but still nervous because some of cp's friends have gained more skills. Mom gets hard on cp, putting pressure on her to "get better" tumbling, jumps, body positions, etc. Mom is starting to understand score sheets, now knows how to look up performance orders like a pro, stalk you tube and picture websites to see what her cp's team is up against. She is full flegged into having her cp be on a winning team! Now the mom knows all the weaknesses of her cp's gym, and will take every opportunity to point out those weaknesses!! Talk about changing gyms is rampant, unless cp's gym has a winning record. Even if it does there will still be issues mom needs to complain about and the thoughts about whether the grass is greener at the other gyms sometimes wins out and they move. Complaints about other kids, coaches, methods, other parents, etc is at it's peak!!!

Fourth year: Mom is still psycho, but cp is progressing even more and that is enough to keep mom happy, especially if there was a gym change. Mom is into full flegged cheer mania!! She wants that win bad!!! Relationships with other cheer moms have developed, even moms from other gyms. She may still be putting tons of pressure on cp to fix this and that, get this and that etc.

Fifth year: Mom still has hidden anxiety but has stopped telling everyone about it. She has met some other 3rd year psycho moms and realize how insanely idiotic they act. She has come to terms with her own cp's level and has started taking away the pressures, but still quietly encourages improvement. She enjoys some quiet conversation with other 4+ year cheer moms. She fully understands by now what it takes to win, and has accepted that kids develop in different stages. She also understands now that kids will have strengths and weaknesses, including her own cp, and they can all contribute to a team beautifully.

Sixth year: Mom has settled nicely into a happy group of other veteran moms and laughs out loud at the 3rd year moms. She still wants the win bad, but she realizes now that winning is not everything. She has found a peace with her cp, and gives her the tools she needs to succeed, but no longer pushes so hard. This peace continues through the rest of cp's cheer career.

Now obviously there are exceptions, and lots of them. But I have seen this pattern from soooo many moms. Too bad we can't go from 1st year to 6th year and skip the years in between I guess my advice is, if you enjoy her as a friend, be patient and she will settle back down. If you don't think you can wait a year or two, cut her loose until she's a 5th year mom...haha.

Sadly, for me, this is dead on i'm now in year 6 and have learned to dial down the pressure on my cp. she's lost all her tumbling skills but she still seems happy. So I say, let the chips fall as they may. She'll get it back when she's ready. lol

 

[SharkDad]

Sadly, for me, this is dead on i'm now in year 6 and have learned to dial down the pressure on my cp. she's lost all her tumbling skills but she still seems happy. So I say, let the chips fall as they may. She'll get it back when she's ready. lol

That happened to us as well. She was on high speed personal drive until she got her full. After she landed it and was actually consistent, she took a step back, got scared and just stopped throwing it. I always encouraged her to keep pushing through things, but in this case I could tell she felt like I was too pushy so we took a step back and waited almost 6 months till she was ready again.

 

[FamUsM0m]

i've been waiting for 7 months. she went from throwing her full on tumble track, solid layout on floor, 3 standing to tuck to...not even throwing her bhs. she has to have a spot. she will OCCASIONALLY throw a running robhs...but only if her tumble coach is standing there with his hand out. and even then it's iffy. most of the time he just picks her up and throws her over lol. she said she's afraid of going backwards...but she's not afraid to throw her standing tuck. it's strange. i've left her alone on the issue. she's constantly coming up with new ideas and such to overcome her own fear. they sound logical (such as doing a backwalkover and snapping out of it at the top of the hand stand) she does a lot of bhs's over the barrel. she went through this block before and came back even stronger (which is when she got her standing to tuck and full on track) i just have to sit back and have faith in her. she'll work it out