Coach Has Affair With Girl On Senior Team, Would You Let Your Child Cheer Their?

Discussion in 'Allstar Cheerleading' started by cheermominar, Apr 8, 2013.

  1. NJ Coach

    NJ Coach 10's Across the Board....literally. Staff Member National Champion

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    That's my question as well. Is it a fact that this happened, or rumor. If it is a fact, obviously I'd have issues with it.
     
  2. Lazydaisytoo

    Lazydaisytoo I text ACEDAD all the time

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    Interesting, I had to look up the info for PA. Looks like its about as complicated as our liquor laws.
     
  3. SkyBlue

    SkyBlue I nugget in the back

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    Do you have facts that support this? Is it something that is known? Why did this coach leave the old gym, because of this? Did the owners of the old gym know, if they did, (my opinion) but they should have a responsibility to report this to the gym that hired that coach.
     
  4. SparkleSpankies

    SparkleSpankies I think I can mix Cheer Music

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    I am not a parent but at the end of the day, if it was in fact truth and not a rumor, I am not sure I would want my child at the gym...
     
  5. cheer4evah

    cheer4evah I shimmy daily

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    I agree with what you are saying as far as the coach/athlete relationship, but just wanted to point out that the athlete in question may not be a high school student. My CP would be eligible to cheer on a senior level team through her sophomore year of college (assuming the age cut off remains the same as now). She will graduate from high school when she is 17, won't turn 18 until Sept. 5 of her freshman year of college, and won't be 19 until Sept. 5 of her sophomore year of college. Since she will still be 18 on August 31 of her sophomore year, she could still cheer on a senior team.

    There are a lot of questions that are unanswered in this situation. How old were those involved? If the athlete was 18 or 19 and the coach 20 or 21, it is much different than if the athlete is 15 or 16 and the coach 25 or 26. Since the poster mentioned the coach was married and had a child, I would think he might be at least mid 20s. However, just like a senior level cheerleader isn't necessarily a high school student, a married father could only be 20. My other question is did the athlete's parents know about the relationship? This is the only time I start questioning closed practices. I agree with them 99% of the time, but as a parent how do you monitor these situations if you are not there? I know there are other adults/coaches in the gym, but no one will pay attention to what your child is doing like the parent will.
     
  6. shadow

    shadow Last Pass... on International Open 1

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    Most states have an age of consent. They also have far more stricter laws for adults in position of power like teaches, coaches babysitters.
     
  7. SkyBlue

    SkyBlue I nugget in the back

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    Not sure why age is part of the debate except that if she is under 18 whether or not he should be arrested. Beyond that you still have an athlete/coach relationship and for that fact alone, it should NEVER be allowed. If they needed to carry on an affair, then either she should have left the team or he should have left his position as coach. End of story!
     
  8. Lazydaisytoo

    Lazydaisytoo I text ACEDAD all the time

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    I just meant that its typical PA. Age of consent is 16, but it's still corruption of a minor if they are under 18. And the the position of authority thing. Why not just say 18?

    If you're familiar with our liquor laws, they're just as convoluted.

    I guess I didn't cast my vote before, but I would not send my kid to a gym where a coach had participated in criminal sexual activity with a minor.
     
  9. catlady

    catlady Slow your roll, Sparkle.

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    I'm all about forgiveness, however with that said, that doesn't mean you give a person that abused their authority over a child another job with authority over children.
     
  10. JMW

    JMW When all else fails.... I shimmy

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    I don't think I would....BUT - maybe there's another side to the story? Sometimes gossip is not always based on truth!
     
  11. WorkToWin

    WorkToWin Slow your roll, Sparkle.

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    He was married with his first kid and had an affair? I don't care how common cheating is now days... he deserves to go straight to hell in my book. No way in the world I would give him a job... ESPECIALLY since he had an affair with one of his athletes at his last job. Of course assuming it was proved/confessed.
     
  12. cheermominar

    cheermominar Cheer Stalker

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    I am not 100% sure of her age, really you can attend HS up until your 21 but I am sure she isn't 21. She was a senior in HS last year so she may have been 18yrs at the most? He is in his mid to late 20's. He just left his wife a month ago. But for those of you that think it's okay, their are a ton of 18yr old seniors in High School, does that mean it's okay for their teachers to date them or vice versa? Where my husband works he and I couldn't even had dated if I was his secretary or worked under him. I don't know if her parents knew, it's a small town and I am sure they knew. I don't think her parents where ever at the gym or even the comps? Being that she is 10yrs older then my cp and on a different team I never really saw her to know her. From what I understand the gym owners did confront him but he denied it all. Also I believe it's against the law for employers to say bad things about whom they employee? Other people tried to tell her she was making a mistake. This is coaches 2nd affair. His 1st was years ago, with another coach (he was single and she married a child was created from this). That gym owner closed up shop and moved away. So what ever, life moves on all is forgiven that ended and people do make mistakes. But what about the 2nd time (this time around) are "Hoe" coaches okay? The new owner was more then willing to let him stay with some limits (he is not to be their after a certion time, basically trying to make it so he would never be their by himself). He left for the other gym before our season was over. It's sort of a bittersweet, the old and new owners didn't want him but we are a cheer gym with out a coach and who wants to drop everything to come to a tiny gym. Anyway, his ex-wife may have told the new gym all of this, but then she won't get any child support if he doesn't work either. At the end I guess as a parent you have no idea what kind of history your coaches have?
     
  13. SkyBlue

    SkyBlue I nugget in the back

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    If this is known and fact, then there are no excuses, this gym should not have hired him. He can find a job in an industry where he would not be working directly with kids/teens. He can be there with limits? What good is that, how do they know he won't get a phone number or give a phone number to get together with an athlete? He doesn't belong working in any gym.
     
  14. NEliteSteven

    NEliteSteven Slow your roll, Sparkle.

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    Steven Hogenson
    Coach at Northern Elite
    I'm not sure why you're bringing up a first affair, though. That's not really applicable. If I cheat on my boyfriend, it's not really anyone's business at the gym I'm coaching at.
    As far as the one with a student, if he was indeed still coaching when this was going on, he should have been terminated immediately. However, a lot of this seems like gossip without any dates and facts.
     
  15. Mom2Cheergirls

    Mom2Cheergirls I have my own cheer message board

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    Regardless of age a coach has a responsibility to keep professional boundaries (don't have sex with your cheerleaders) if they can not do that they should not be a coach end of story.