Crickets....

Discussion in 'High School Cheerleading' started by OldskoolKYcheercoach, Aug 13, 2019.

  1. OldskoolKYcheercoach

    OldskoolKYcheercoach There are Cheeropedia articles about me!

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    The first thing I thought is: why is she flying a basket to begin with?

    I know there are more score sheets than just UCA, but I haven’t seen a HS score sheet of any organization in years where baskets were worth the risk.

    Regardless:


    Team has a culture problem if the concern of the leaders is more focused on their ability to practice/perform than the well-being of their teammate.

    That would be my biggest concern.

    Personally, as a coach, I make an attempt to check on any athlete with any degree of injury that occurs at practice. I also manage my own injuries and leave the trainer out 95% of the time, as I’m better educated in such things than she is. In some places, it’s more common for athletes who are injured to be the sole responsibility of the trainer. The trainer communicates with the coach about the nature of the injury and the expected rehab time. We also have an understanding that I’m often leaving practice and heading to work (the kids see me in my work uniform and know why). So sometimes I don’t get to check up on them until the next morning. It would be hard for me to judge a coach based on their timelines of a response to text messages. Not all situations are created equally.
     
  2. ErinS

    ErinS Slow your roll, Sparkle. World Champion GIF Poster

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    We’re on the same page to a T, I again just was having a hard time separating professional from aunt.

    Basket tosses are a skill taught through progression. You just don’t randomly grab a kid at the end of the summer the month before competition season and teach them a kick full (she was doing straight rides but the end goal was a kick full). We’re in SC. To max on the scoresheet you have to throw 4 baskets with two skills. No comment on that.


    The culture and climate of the team is also a concern of mine. You have seniors (captains) explicitly telling teammates to not go to the hospital without consulting the team. I’m also concerned that she didn’t feel comfortable enough to say “hey. I’ve never done a basket I don’t feel comfortable” —- was that culture/climate ( too afraid to speak up), genuinely not wanting to let the team down or simply thinking she can do it.

    The communication, again district policies, chain of command.. It is what it is, I know them because I have to follow them.

    Full transparency as well, the head injury and the fact that she was diagnosed with a concussion naturally left my family on edge being that we just dealt with another child in our immediate family having an AVM so while clearly not the same thing, when you have another child just discharged from the hospital after brain surgery you go above and beyond to check on another one that gets hit in the head.

    I just wanted a peaceful school year.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
  3. Sterling von Shimmer

    Sterling von Shimmer I named my pet Sir Fierce-a-lot

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    These kids are behaving like entitled little snots. I hate the piling on. I hate that they’re denying her own experience. I hate that they’re telling her what to do like they’re her coach and not her peers. And the cherry on topI hate the sniveling little argument, “Well something different happened to someone who isn’t you, so obviously you don’t have a concussion.” Whoever came up with that little gem is not destined for a career in medicine. Or law.

    That said, I’d urge your niece to reconsider quitting unless she feels her coach is so incompetent that her safety was at risk (which may well be the case). Because as someone who experienced bullying on cheer, you don’t want to give the bullies what they want. Because then tey win, and she literally loses something important to her. I didn’t quit in the face of bullying for all these reasons. And it was hard, but I learned/internalized an important lesson: do not care what terrible people think of you. Like really don’t care all the way to your bones (as opposed to just telling yourself you don’t care). Which is something I carry with me today.

    I’m not trying to oversimplify her experience or be dismissive of her feelings. She needs to do what’s best for her, whatever that means. But I just know for me, overcoming bullying in HS really taught me a lot about myself and my strengths. So now whenever I’m being tested by an adult mean girl, my first thought is, “LOL I was bullied by twelve girls at once who were supposed to be my friends. It didn’t work when I was an insecure 14 y/o and it won’t work now. TRY. ME.” And I’d just love for her to be able to carry that quiet confidence around for the rest of her life by proving to these girls that she will not be pushed around by them.
     
    Last edited: Aug 20, 2019
  4. Sterling von Shimmer

    Sterling von Shimmer I named my pet Sir Fierce-a-lot

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    We do this for cracking down on BS injuries: if they’re so hurt they can’t come to practice, they need to be cleared by their doctor before they come back. It puts the onus back on them. And if they miss choreo or piss off their stunt group in that time...too bad. They’re “injured,” there’s nothing you can do.

    And if you STILL get girls faking injuries to get out of practice, you tell them that obviously their health is at risk if they continue to cheer and that they need to take a year off and recover. It’s a liability issue otherwise. That removes the “Haha can’t cut me if I’m injured!” safety net.
     
  5. quitthedrama

    quitthedrama I buy my Insta followers

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    Don't worry. Their moms will do everything for them in college too. I am on a "non-sanctioned" parent page (run by former student's parents and not the University) and most of the posts are cringeworthy. It floors me the number of parents who need to do everything for their adult children - 90% of the posts should be deleted or not responded to because it is something the student should be taking care of but instead there are hundreds of replies. And god forbid you give them some real talk ("let them handle it and leave them alone" for example) you are reprimanded for bullying. It's entertaining but concerning at the same time.
     
  6. coacha

    coacha I Fierce Board instead of work/study

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    Yep. A friend of mine works for a college and you wouldn’t believe the calls she gets.

    “My daughter doesn’t have anyone to eat lunch with” was a phone call this week. (The first week of the semester.)
     
  7. oncecoolcoachnowmom

    oncecoolcoachnowmom Bestest Newbie '14

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    I set up parent forums to talk about the transition to college as part of my role at a HS.

    Questions I have gotten at college nights include:

    "Will someone be there to help her make her schedule to make sure she chooses the right things?"
    "If she is sick and needs an extension who handles that?"
    "Can I speak with someone at a college if my daughter is having roommate problems?"

    The look on some of my high school parent faces when you first explain to them about FERPA/privacy re: an over 18 student (and the fact that a University won't even entertain your call unless your kid has filled out a waiver to ALLOW the school to share info) is alarming.
     
  8. Sterling von Shimmer

    Sterling von Shimmer I named my pet Sir Fierce-a-lot

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    We’ve really lost the importance of the “figure it out” brand of parenting.

    I took a psych class my freshman year. The professor told us to write a paper in something called APA format. She gave us a handout of what that meant, and sent us on our way. We were not allowed to ask questions. We just had to figure it out with the materials provided.

    We all failed it HARD. But we learned and never made the mistakes again. And that was the point.
     
  9. oncecoolcoachnowmom

    oncecoolcoachnowmom Bestest Newbie '14

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    I remember having to actually go get a book from the library (everything I'd done in HS was MLA.) I certainly did not think of calling my mom/dad/stepdad. Even if I did, any of them would probably have told me "I don't know. I'm at work bye."
     
  10. DonnaM

    DonnaM I Fierce Board instead of work/study

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    They don’t have to be over 18. Parents have NO say in college programs if their child is accepted, period, unless the child allows it. It can leave everyone in kind of a strange legal position if a minor student needs help, but has not waived FERPA, because the school CANNOT contact the parents, but the child cannot sign legal paperwork or for medical care themselves. Most early college programs require the student waive FERPA as a requirement of participation, but even with FERPA waived, the level of parent contact and control is way below that a high school is required to provide.

    I have to explain that pretty much every single semester to parents who think of dual enrollment or early college as just another high school class. It isn’t.
     
  11. Lisa Seye

    Lisa Seye I'm an announcer on CBS for Worlds (or should be)

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    I took my 17 year old to college orientation and the folks at this college told me they could talk to me since my son is a minor and that he would have to sign forms when he turns 18 next year. So they all seem to think they can talk to me. I wont tell them differently lol.
     
  12. quitthedrama

    quitthedrama I buy my Insta followers

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    Yup, multiple posts asking to set up "play dates" for their kids the first few weeks of the semester (the incoming freshman class has 6,200+ in it and over 170 clubs). Last week was rush so anyone involved with that moved in a week earlier than the official move in date. Those girls are basically running from 7am-11pm every day and they must have had a day off or something over the weekend because mothers were posting that their kids had nothing to do and were "stuck in their room" and parents were posting blaming the school for not having planned activities for them that one day!