All-Star Gym Switching Rant

[cheergirlbrey]

As we end one season and embark on another, I really must ask why does there have to be so much drama when you leave a team? As a parent I seem to be dealing with it alot more than cp and can't believe how high school 30+ women act. I for one know how to separate true friendships from my kids activities or even work. Loyalty and commitment keep getting thrown around. Well when do we decide we've been loyal to a fault? How many years of commitment can there possibly be in certain situations? And doesn't following through with a full season equal commitment? Especially when cp often begged to walk away, wasn't honoring and standing by her team commitment enough?

The reality of it is people switch gyms for many reasons wether you have been with a program 1yr,5 or 10 ! Maybe the gym has not grown or maybe its to big. Maybe the team itself is changing. Maybe cp is just plain ready for new opportunities. Sometimes the grass is greener ad sometimes its not but often we never know unless we run through it.

In the end it really just comes down to this.....Its not necessarily personal, we all just have to do what is best for our cps and our own situation. And it really shouldn't matter what colors you where as we cheer for our friends ols and new on the cheer floor
Those of you living the same drama...share and good luck on your new adventures!

 

[CharlieCheers]

It's just gonna come with it. When you switch gyms, people usually jump to many conclusions and accuse you of false accusations. Just keep your head high and have a great season!

 

[dawn]

Always do what is right for your CP....PERIOD....love the experiences and the people you meet along the way , but as much as it hurts your heart...you have to do what is right for your baby. You are paying for a service, and if you are not happy with the service , it shouldnt be an issue....ESPECIALLY.... if your kid stuck it out til the end of the year.. I still have very strong feelings for EVERY team my daughter has been on, whether they choose to believe this or not, I will always stand right behind VIP. Looove All the kids....some others not so much...The so called adults / coaches etc..of a gym..sometimes make the transition harder than it has to be. Videos taken down, bashing on FB...yes it hurts. but keep your CP centered and always proud of her background...and it will eventually fade away, and make your CP stronger...

In the end it really just comes down to this.....Its not necessarily personal, we all just have to do what is best for our cps and our own situation. And it really shouldn't matter what colors you wear as we all love cheer and it should be fun to cheer for our friends , old and new on the cheer floor
Those of you living the same drama...share and good luck on your new adventures!

 

[dawn]

As we end one season and embark on another, I really must ask why does there have to be so much drama when you leave a team? As a parent I seem to be dealing with it alot more than cp and can't believe how high school 30+ women act. I for one know how to separate true friendships from my kids activities or even work. Loyalty and commitment keep getting thrown around. Well when do we decide we've been loyal to a fault? How many years of commitment can there possibly be in certain situations? And doesn't following through with a full season equal commitment? Especially when cp often begged to walk away, wasn't honoring and standing by her team commitment enough?

The reality of it is people switch gyms for many reasons wether you have been with a program 1yr,5 or 10 ! Maybe the gym has not grown or maybe its to big. Maybe the team itself is changing. Maybe cp is just plain ready for new opportunities. Sometimes the grass is greener ad sometimes its not but often we never know unless we run through it.

In the end it really just comes down to this.....Its not necessarily personal, we all just have to do what is best for our cps and our own situation. And it really shouldn't matter what colors you where as we cheer for our friends ols and new on the cheer floor
Those of you living the same drama...share and good luck on your new adventures!

Just an FYI.. some how my post blended with this?? from In the end it really comes down to this......

 

[jcheermom]

As we end one season and embark on another, I really must ask why does there have to be so much drama when you leave a team? As a parent I seem to be dealing with it alot more than cp and can't believe how high school 30+ women act. I for one know how to separate true friendships from my kids activities or even work. Loyalty and commitment keep getting thrown around. Well when do we decide we've been loyal to a fault? How many years of commitment can there possibly be in certain situations? And doesn't following through with a full season equal commitment? Especially when cp often begged to walk away, wasn't honoring and standing by her team commitment enough?

The reality of it is people switch gyms for many reasons wether you have been with a program 1yr,5 or 10 ! Maybe the gym has not grown or maybe its to big. Maybe the team itself is changing. Maybe cp is just plain ready for new opportunities. Sometimes the grass is greener ad sometimes its not but often we never know unless we run through it.

In the end it really just comes down to this.....Its not necessarily personal, we all just have to do what is best for our cps and our own situation. And it really shouldn't matter what colors you where as we cheer for our friends ols and new on the cheer floor
Those of you living the same drama...share and good luck on your new adventures!

First of all, I commend you for sticking it out and finishing the season, when it sounds like CP was ready to bail-you have taught her a valuable lesson to finish your committment and leave with dignity and respect. When we left our gym-at the end of our season, CP and I suffered the wrath of rumors that the old gym spread about us and CP's friendships were tested by the owners and coaches encouraging her former teammates not to socialize with her-she was there for 9 years. Eventually, athletes from the old gym did come around and were able to talk to us at competitions and CP and most of her old friends were ok with her, or they just didn't care anymore what the coaches said about talking to us. We left because CP wanted better opportunities and where she went has given her those experiences she would have never had at her old gym and we are glad CP switched gyms. We don't regret it, but we saw the truly ugly side of people that we didn't know that they had. Hang in there-you switched because you thought it was best and they are taking it personally and it wasn't personal. You switched service providers because your current service provider wasn't working out-you would do the same thing if you were seeing a doctor or dentist that wasn't meeting your needs- you would seek another practitioner to provide that service. Good luck in your transition and hang tough!

 

[cupieqt]

When people leave their selected team to go to a competitors it just feels wrong and awful (it's exactly like getting dumped--all that time and effort put into a relationship that didn't last). Unfortunately adults have always had a harder time handling this maturely. That's why there are tryout/evaluations at the end of every season. It's a one year contract each season even if the family has been with you from the day you opened your doors 12 years ago. It sucks but unless coaches/owners/parents learn to deal with it maturely they're only further hurting their program. I cry in private, I rant to my mom or husband (neither of which are involved in my work) and I smile and say goodbye with well wishes. And always with the clear understanding that we want them to return (bc one day they will!! Trust me) and then I turn around and look at my team with pride and get back to work.

Here are a few things that make it easier to avoid the drama if you're leaving (not always bc some people just can't be mature):
1. Don't broadcast your departure. Not online, not at practice and not around other athletes. Just telling them is enough to incite a riot. They should find out from the coach who can then help ease their feelings about it and encourage civilized behavior.
2. Don't blindside the coach. Have a meeting. Allow them to listen and listen to them. A face to face is a lot less likely to get ugly.
3. Don't text or send notice through anything/anyone else. At least pick up the phone. If I've spent 3 days a week for 3 years developing your childs skills, I deserve a phone call. We have a real relationship.

 

[cheergirlbrey]

You are all so right! We actually were very upfront about our decision a while ago to be honest and fair to all those involved and were originally going to take an all star break. Im also helping the booster club transition with a new board as I feel its fair to those left alone. For my cp it was about already losing most of her team over the years and just moving on to a strict cheer gym with strict training even if cp ends up remaining at the same level ( though we already have progressed ). As the days go on I already know who our friendships will still be with. I mostly an really feeling for some of the other families leaving right now since they feel like they are between a rock and a hard place! Most of them are a bit newer to the sport than us and just want to do right by their kids without pressure.

 

[cheerisgood]

here's what bugs me....all season long the parent complains (rarely is it the child being so vocal) 'they should do this, they should do that, i don't understand why x is happening,' etc..you all get my drift. then, as the end of the season and tryouts approach, ultimatums are thrown, if susie doesn't make this team, if susie doesn't get center flyer, dancer, jumper, etc., we're leaving...etc THEN, when people start talking about the them and the fact their leaving, they get all indignent...first off, YOU complained all year, you told anyone w/i earshot that you would leave, so DON'T get all bent out of shape when people ask/talk. Own up to your decision. Yes, I agree we all need to do what's best for our child, but last time i checked there is no "I" in T-E-A-M...not disrepecting, just my opinion.

 

[Just-a-Mom]

I think of all the people I've met in my life who were changing gyms, ONE, and only ONE, was leaving because her daughter didn't get put on the team she wanted. The other thousand left for other reasons - money, location, or scheduling usually. So why does everyone always think this has anything to do with Susie getting her way? Because about .01% of the time that's the case. The other 99.99% of the time it's just a decision to make things easier on the FAMILY. I think people just try to find negative things in other people. Same as the other thread about "cheer moms" - I think most of us are just normal parents who actually are interested in our children's lives, but everyone has to see it as "Oh...she's one of those parents"

I'm just gonna ask: WHY WHY WHY do ya'll even care if people are "those" parents??? So what if they are? It's their kids, their money, their time, and their lives. Why do people have to get so wrapped up in judging everyone else's decisions?

 

[simplymom]

I think of all the people I've met in my life who were changing gyms, ONE, and only ONE, was leaving because her daughter didn't get put on the team she wanted. The other thousand left for other reasons - money, location, or scheduling usually. So why does everyone always think this has anything to do with Susie getting her way? Because about .01% of the time that's the case. The other 99.99% of the time it's just a decision to make things easier on the FAMILY. I think people just try to find negative things in other people. Same as the other thread about "cheer moms" - I think most of us are just normal parents who actually are interested in our children's lives, but everyone has to see it as "Oh...she's one of those parents"

I'm just gonna ask: WHY WHY WHY do ya'll even care if people are "those" parents??? So what if they are? It's their kids, their money, their time, and their lives. Why do people have to get so wrapped up in judging everyone else's decisions?

Where is that mega-shimmy button?:cheering:

 

[cheerisgood]

i'm assuming that you are directing your post at me. this reflects MY opinion of things that I have witnessed. I'm quite sure there are MANY reasons as to why people leave gyms. This is my opinion on one of those scenarios that bug me. Quite frankly, i could care less about who does what, my daughter is my business, but the question was asked. IMO, those types of people are the drama starters and seek attention, negative or positive.

I don't need to look to find negative, i see it everyday and no one is immune.

 

[Just-a-Mom]

i'm assuming that you are directing your post at me. this reflects MY opinion of things that I have witnessed. I'm quite sure there are MANY reasons as to why people leave gyms. This is my opinion on one of those scenarios that bug me. Quite frankly, i could care less about who does what, my daughter is my business, but the question was asked. IMO, those types of people are the drama starters and seek attention, negative or positive.

I don't need to look to find negative, i see it everyday and no one is immune.

No, not really directed at you. Your post made me think of what I said...but your post definitely came off like you were answering the original question. That's why I didn't quote you - didn't want you to think I was coming at YOU. oops...guess that didn't go as planned. It was actually directed at the moms from my old gym...in case they're on here. My Susies have no skills...so we really did just leave for scheduling, location, and finances. Despite what everyone wanted to think.

 

[Mom Jeans]

We've had a lot of if Suzie doesn't make this team nonsense and I really don't care when people leave because of that. Bye and Good Luck. Suzie is usually the one in the back at her new gym.

What I hate is when people leave and cant shut up about leaving even months after they left. They don't say a word to the coach, tell people not believe rumors, and can't stop talking bad about the gym they left. They should realize that if they were so miserable at their gym, gauranteed they were making people miserable and people are glad they are gone, no one is mad they left, they are mad because they can't shut up about it.

Many people leave and it's a nice simple transition, you still remain friendly and see their kids and enjoy watching them grow. It's all in the way you leave. I've had to do it before and I know the feeling of both sides. We left a very small gym and they were just upset because that's one less body, so I get it. Those people usually come around and if they don't oh well no biggy.

 

[CApantherSmallSenior90]

I had a hard time switching gyms.
i got a bid to go to las vegas for individuals and everything was paid for, and the week before my coach said she wasnt going to take me any more because i was going to another gym.
I got talked about alot and made fun of and people made up rumors.
It was kinda dissappointing because alot of them go to my school, but it was all worth it!
its all ok now becuase its been several years. but its always hard at first.

 

[cupieqt]

I had a hard time switching gyms.
i got a bid to go to las vegas for individuals and everything was paid for, and the week before my coach said she wasnt going to take me any more because i was going to another gym.
I got talked about alot and made fun of and people made up rumors.
It was kinda dissappointing because alot of them go to my school, but it was all worth it!
its all ok now becuase its been several years. but its always hard at first.

If I were your coach and I knew you were leaving my gym for another, I probably wouldn't bring you either bc of the costs involved. It doesn't make sense to spend money on travel, etc bc it's no longer an investment in the future of my program.
That may not have been the case in your situation but that's how I would have handled it and the reason why.