All-Star You Need A Little Whine With That Cheese?

[paintdog1]

Here's the story; I coach softball pitching to girls from 7 to 18. Many (about 15) of my students are also cheerleaders. About half are All Stars from the local gym. The rest cheer in middle school, high school and the local rec league.
I'm running into more and more problems because the cheer coaches are very unforgiving when it comes to splitting time for the girls between me and their gym. Competitions, practices, fund raisers, team bonding, etc. are all more important than my sessions. Since I don't coach a team, only train students, it actually is not as bad as it could be, but still it's irritating. I give up a lot of time working with these girls because their All Star coaches haven't learned how to share. Even my three granddaughters have given up softball because of the demands on their time for cheer and schoolwork. My students train about 3-5 hours per week and I'm not sure how much time they put in at the local gym, but it seems to be a lot. I completely understand that if you want to be the best you have to concentrate and put the time in, but if I'm willing to give in a bit, why can't other coaches? My high school and rec cheerleaders are no problem as you might imagine. I think cheerleading and cheerleaders are incredible athletes, so I'm not really looking for a solution, although any ideas are welcome, and since Fierce Board IS a cheer site, I'm trying to be very polite to all of you. Do you think I have a legitimate complaint, or am I just being grumpy?

 

[oncecoolcoachnowmom]

Having coached school and all star, I can tell you it is REALLY frustrating at times to try to work around schedules.

My school kids have all star practice. My all star kids have school practice.

School cheer doesn't practice quite as much and it is an April to Feb type commitment. So our practices times are such that they end before area AS practices start so my school cheer kids rarely miss for it. We also compete 3 times, and not on the same weekend as an all star comp any of them go to. So I've been lucky in that I don't have issues with school cheer missing for all stars.

On the other hand, All Stars is ALL YEAR. I need them in practice. I can't really have an effective practice with absent kids (unlike other sports.)

This is going to sound bad, but my only valid excuses for missing all star practice were events related to academics. Ex: My project is in the science fair.

You could be absent for other things, but that would impact your spot on the team. Ex: If you go to Fiji for 2 weeks, it WILL affect where you're placed in the routine or if you're in it at all.

Not to mention, the same girl who misses every other day for ballet/softball/dance/band concert is the same one with the pouty face when she is not choreographed as point flyer.

Or when she's like "Where's MY spot in the routine?"

Your spot is at ballet. Where you've been for the past 2 weeks.

 

[HeyMom]

In our area, all star is an all year program in most gyms so the athletes going into it need to understand what that means. And if that means my athlete can't participate in other sports/extra-curricular activities than I will have to help my child make that decision. As a parent of a child who chooses to participate in all star, it is extremely frustrating to show up for every single practice only to find out some of the kids are missing because they are at basket weaving group. All star practices tend to be unproductive when the whole team is not there.

 

[CheerBank]

Here's the story; I coach softball pitching to girls from 7 to 18. Many (about 15) of my students are also cheerleaders. About half are All Stars from the local gym. The rest cheer in middle school, high school and the local rec league.
I'm running into more and more problems because the cheer coaches are very unforgiving when it comes to splitting time for the girls between me and their gym. Competitions, practices, fund raisers, team bonding, etc. are all more important than my sessions. Since I don't coach a team, only train students, it actually is not as bad as it could be, but still it's irritating. I give up a lot of time working with these girls because their All Star coaches haven't learned how to share. Even my three granddaughters have given up softball because of the demands on their time for cheer and schoolwork. My students train about 3-5 hours per week and I'm not sure how much time they put in at the local gym, but it seems to be a lot. I completely understand that if you want to be the best you have to concentrate and put the time in, but if I'm willing to give in a bit, why can't other coaches? My high school and rec cheerleaders are no problem as you might imagine. I think cheerleading and cheerleaders are incredible athletes, so I'm not really looking for a solution, although any ideas are welcome, and since Fierce Board IS a cheer site, I'm trying to be very polite to all of you. Do you think I have a legitimate complaint, or am I just being grumpy?

I think if your issue was with a private softball club, I would understand where you are coming from.
Our kids do all-star cheer. We pay a lot of $ for that. If Susie still wants to play softball and take private softball lessons, but is finding that the lessons conflict with all-star cheer practices, comps, what have you, then maybe she should not be doing all-star cheer but stick with school or rec cheer where they coaches are perhaps a little more flexible. Or maybe she should decide that she can't be dedicated to softball at the level that is needed and choose cheer instead.
There comes a point when kids and their parents have to make a decision about what sports and activities they are going to participate in so that they can fully participate and not be torn in different directions.

 

[oncecoolcoachnowmom]

There comes a point when kids and their parents have to make a decision about what sports and activities they are going to participate in so that they can fully participate and not be torn in different directions.

YES.

There really does come a point in a kid's life where they do need to choose.

Ex: You cannot play elite travel softball on a team that travels every weekend in April and be on a Worlds team.

Does this mean no more softball EVER? No.

Maybe it means local rec softball and Worlds team. Or Rec Cheer and elite, private travel softball.

Either way, an adjustment has to be made in the commitment level because depending on the activity, you can not do both. Especially when it comes to seasonal sports v. all year cheer.

It's not an easy conversation to have. But the goal in coaching is for me to look out for the other 25 girls on that mat. If your repeated absence impacts the quality of practices, something's going to give. And it is generally not going to be me as I have a program and those other 25 to look out for.

 

[amy1k]

Yes. Honestly it kills me that my child has had to give up so many other activities/opportunities because of her commitment to her team. It kills me even more that other children don't, so often my child's practice time is compromised. The same child who can't come to practices for a month because of poorly scheduled driver's ed class, WILL be the one who can't come to practice because of cramps (that actually happened this week). And when that child is also a crossover? Ugh. That's a parent saying that my money and time is less valuable than there's.


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[oncecoolcoachnowmom]

In addition, all star programs ARE coming out with new half-year and limited travel teams for those who are highly committed to other sports but still want to cheer.

These teams have fewer comps and generally fewer practices.

Those are great options for kids who (for example) are totally into softball but still want the all star experience.

But if you have your eye on L5, Worlds, etc. choices need to be made.

 

[amy1k]

My son plays year round baseball. If he misses a practice, his team can practice without him and another kid may get an opportunity he may not have otherwise to take my kid's starting position. A baseball practice can manage missing a kid or two (not saying my kid misses). When a cheerleader misses a practice, there may be at least three others who don't get to practice their part...not to mention things like pyramids.

Sorry, but I'm really irritated about this right now. So many kids and parents think that mandatory practices don't apply to them. I wish coaches would follow through more often.


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[dawgshow]

There comes a time where kids need to realize that they can't do it all. The fact is that travel sports (which competitive cheer is) are very time consuming. Our gym is pretty forgiving from April-October but October on, they own you unless it's school related.


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[paintdog1]

My son plays year round baseball. If he misses a practice, his team can practice without him and another kid may get an opportunity he may not have otherwise to take my kid's starting position. A baseball practice can manage missing a kid or two (not saying my kid misses). When a cheerleader misses a practice, there may be at least three others who don't get to practice their part...not to mention things like pyramids.

Sorry, but I'm really irritated about this right now. So many kids and parents think that mandatory practices don't apply to them. I wish coaches would follow through more often.


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Believe me, I know where all of you are coming from. It IS a difficult situation. When you do choose the elite level of a sport, whether it be softball or cheer or whatever, you have to know that that sport will take almost all of your time. And then the critics come back on us coaches and say we are making one-dimensional kids. Sigh.
I really appreciate all the responses so far.

 

[cheergirl09]

When I coached high school I had a handful of girls who also were on Allstars. The issue I ran into was that I had roughly 4-5 girls from gym A and 4-5 girls from gym B. Gym A's coaches were more than willing to work with me to come up with a practice schedule to where we both accommodated each other since both teams were very competitive whereas gym B's coaches were not willing to work with me at all. We had a rule that if you missed 3 practices unexcused you were off the team and missing for your other extracurricular activity did not count as excused so unfortunately girls from gym B ended up getting dismissed from my team. It sucked big time but we have rules for a reason. Luckily the girls missed the three practices during summer so we were able to replace their spots before we started any choreography.


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[Momager]

My cp has been juggling two travel sports for years. It is really tough, takes a huge toll on the entire family, and has interfered with her ability to do school sports and any other activity normal teens do. To be competitive in all star it takes the whole team and many hours of practice. I doubt the all star gyms have it in for you. The kids are probably doing what is the norm for all star so they can be as good as the teams they compete against.

 

[CheerBank]

Believe me, I know where all of you are coming from. It IS a difficult situation. When you do choose the elite level of a sport, whether it be softball or cheer or whatever, you have to know that that sport will take almost all of your time. And then the critics come back on us coaches and say we are making one-dimensional kids. Sigh.
I really appreciate all the responses so far.

I feel it is the parents who are making the one-dimensional kids, not the coaches. Most coaches are going to want their athletes to be fully dedicated to their sport, but there are plenty of them who understand that at a young age kids should not feel forced to choose.
My son is 10. He plays travel soccer in the spring and fall, as well as football in the fall and lax in the spring. Soccer games are always Saturdays at this point; football and lax games on Sundays. Where we have to juggle are with the practices but we do the best we can and his coaches know that he plays other sports than theirs. He enjoys all 3, and we are hoping he will not have to make a choice until 7th grade when he can try out for the school teams. Granted, these are all "town" teams and not private clubs. If he was playing for a private soccer club or a travel lax team, our dedication to that sport would have to be very different.

 

[Cheermom1969]

Believe me, I know where all of you are coming from. It IS a difficult situation. When you do choose the elite level of a sport, whether it be softball or cheer or whatever, you have to know that that sport will take almost all of your time. And then the critics come back on us coaches and say we are making one-dimensional kids. Sigh.
I really appreciate all the responses so far.

It's not the coaches making kids one dimentional. Sometimes it's the parents. And sometimes, like in my case, it's the kid! I tried everything to get my daughter to try stick and ball sports! I'm a football mom and played soccer as a kid! Cheer was the LAST sport on my radar. But my daughter has chosen this AS cheer gig and puts her heart and soul into it. It's who she is.

I'm glad she didn't have to choose and found what she loves because juggling football, baseball and basketball like my son did was a huge burden on our family.

I think at some point these kids have to choose their sport as they get closer to high school because so many of them have become year-round sports. Football isn't just July to November anymore. They train year round. And those boys who play baseball? Well, they're behind by the times they join the team because plays have been taught and positions are starting to be assigned, etc. (Just an example)

 

[Lazydaisytoo]

When I coached high school I had a handful of girls who also were on Allstars. The issue I ran into was that I had roughly 4-5 girls from gym A and 4-5 girls from gym B. Gym A's coaches were more than willing to work with me to come up with a practice schedule to where we both accommodated each other since both teams were very competitive whereas gym B's coaches were not willing to work with me at all. We had a rule that if you missed 3 practices unexcused you were off the team and missing for your other extracurricular activity did not count as excused so unfortunately girls from gym B ended up getting dismissed from my team. It sucked big time but we have rules for a reason. Luckily the girls missed the three practices during summer so we were able to replace their spots before we started any choreography.

Our HS made it easy-- they do not allow girls to cheer both AllStar and HS. CP and her teammates love competing, and the HS team is probably 95% sideline based, so their choice was easy.