High School Mean Girls

[glitterandbows12]

recently at a cheer clinic we started to stunt, I was switching off backing with this girl a year older than me who was not doing a very good job and the entire stunt group was just socializing, im younger than all of them so I thought it wasn't my place to ask if we should switch yet and they ended off just walking away to spot other groups. I went over to spot my friend and the high school coach was there. He asked me if i had stunted and he told me not to lie to him so I truthfully said no.. He then started yelling at the girl infront of the entire team + 8th graders. She just stood there nodding while he went off about how he told her to switch off and on, i just stood their awkwardly noticing everyone staring at me. I sort of figured she would think that I tattled on her.. and the funny thing is after he yelled at her she went on to socialize even more!!! After the clinic one of my team mates had over heard the high school girls talking about me calling me a "b***- you figure out the rest and they were all saying "why would she tattle in high school how immature" I dont want them to think im a "tattle tail" but i dont know what to do..

 

[SharkDad]

This kind of stuff is pretty serious to me and hits home since I watched kids do this when my CP was in HS.

1st off - never let anyone's opinions about you change how you feel about yourself. You know you did nothing wrong and it's them who are being judgemental. They can either come up and ask you what really happened or they just being petty and you don't have to bother with it at all. Unfortunately girls/teens can be like that.

2nd - this may end up being nothing and all forgetten by the end of the summer. Keep being who you are and eventually the team will either appreciate you for who you are or maybe they aren't a team that's worth being a part of.

3d - I hope #2 is the case, but if they do decide to not let this go and start to be mean or worse: start to bully you DON'T put up with it. Remember they are the one's wrong and all you have to do is explain yuorself once. If they won't let you go let a friend, parent, teacher or someone you trust know so that you don't deal with it alone. Heck ask us here and I'm sure you'll get plenty of support.

Again, I hope this is nothing, but in case it gets worse or anyone else is dealing with a similar situation, hopefully some of this helps.

 

[cheysmomager]

Shark Dad you are my hero!! Unfortunatly your response is not what these kids get most of the time. I know this because my daughter has been through it. Plus our school is being sued by multiple families for not taking care of reported bullying incident.

Glitterandbows when I saw the title of this post, I actually thought that maybe my daughter wrote it. She was bullied out of her cheer gym and then stuck on her varsity squad (only 8 girls) with 2 that still go to that gym. Sharkdad is exactly right!! I truly hope that it will be soon forgotten.

On the off chance it's not, please talk to somebody!! Preferably a parent, if not a shcool councelor. Do not hold it all in. Bullying can have devestating permanant effects!! At your young age, you are not able to cope as well as you may think.

My daughter has been through school cheerleaders bullying her and an all star coach bullying her. She has worked very hard to turn it into a positive, but she knows she couldn't have done that alone. Earlier this year, she made a video of her story (at the gym) and put it on YouTube in hope to help others in the same situation. I will glady get you two in touch if you would like to talk to someone your age (she's 15) about it.

Everyone here is rooting for you!!

 

[gymcatmomx2]

I agree with the above posts completely. There have been 2 incidents where my daughter has had to deal with some of her fellow cheerleaders ganging up on her (it's always the same ones) and she was the captain!! My advice, which is what I told her, is to let it blow over and ignore any comments relating to the incident. Eventually, there will be some other drama that will catch their attention. However, if things do get more serious, then please don't hesitate to bring the adults in. I had to text one of the other moms to get the drama to stop... and it did. Hold your head up high and know that this will pass.

 

[SharkDad]

My daughter has been through school cheerleaders bullying her and an all star coach bullying her. She has worked very hard to turn it into a positive, but she knows she couldn't have done that alone. Earlier this year, she made a video of her story (at the gym) and put it on YouTube in hope to help others in the same situation. I will glady get you two in touch if you would like to talk to someone your age (she's 15) about it.

Everyone here is rooting for you!!

I remember your CP posting. I hope things are better and she is a more confident young lady for it now.

 

[cheysmomager]

WOW!! I Believe you are thinking about me posting. I just allowed her to look at the boards around Christmas and get an account around NCA this year.

She is actually a strong girl. It got her down for a bit, but when she did her video she was on her way back up.

What I thought was really neat, was she was writing inspirational sayings on her shoes the day before she tried out for Cheer Athletics. When she was done, on her left toe area was a letter and another on her right. She put his initials one on each toe, so right before she took off for her specialty pass, she would remember what he called her. Even though she has been taking private lessons this whole year, I started to notice her tuck wasn't as high as it was last season (she had lost her power). I was VERY worried (don't tell her) about that when she was in tryouts. When she rounded the corner to where I was waiting I noticed her "confident" smile and I KNEW IT!! I asked how was her tumbling and her tuck and she said she nailed it all. So she is keeping his initials on her practice shoes. She doesn't want anyone at Cheer Athletics to know, so if this is seen, please don't tell. She doesn't want them to think they she may not be able to do it, she wants them to know her first before/if at all, they find out. She said if anyone asks what they mean, she just going to say they are the initials of a man who said she couldn't so it.

Thank you for asking!! And anytime someone is having problems being bullied and want to talk to someone their own age she will be glad to talk to them.


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[CheerKatie08]

This kind of stuff is pretty serious to me and hits home since I watched kids do this when my CP was in HS.

1st off - never let anyone's opinions about you change how you feel about yourself. You know you did nothing wrong and it's them who are being judgemental. They can either come up and ask you what really happened or they just being petty and you don't have to bother with it at all. Unfortunately girls/teens can be like that.
2nd - this may end up being nothing and all forgetten by the end of the summer. Keep being who you are and eventually the team will either appreciate you for who you are or maybe they aren't a team that's worth being a part of.

Such great advice! No wonder your CP turned out to be such a beautiful, sweet girl!

 

[CheerKatie08]

Also, if you are being bullied, please read this poem. Keep your head up and don't lose sight of your values!

People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.
The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Be good anyway.
Honesty and frankness will make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.
People need help but will attack you if you help them.
Help them anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God.
It was never between you and them anyway.

 

[SharkDad]

Such great advice! No wonder your CP turned out to be such a beautiful, sweet girl!

You're awesome Katie. I'm happy we all got to hang out for a Cheersport and she got to meet "the world famous..."

If you are ever this way, let me know. Or I am sure she would love a visit if you are near Nashville.

 

[CheerKatie08]

You're awesome Katie. I'm happy we all got to hang out for a Cheersport and she got to meet "the world famous..."

If you are ever this way, let me know. Or I am sure she would love a visit if you are near Nashville.

Does she go to school in Nashville?! I'm about 2.5 hours away. I know you all are far away, & sometimes there are emergencies or just an "I need to get away from school" weekend. Let her know if she ever needs ANYTHING, my doors are always open! I'll message you my info.