All-Star Why Do Some Cheer Families And Cheerleaders Take It Personal When You Change Gyms?

[Helen uk uni cheer]

I am currently in the process of finding a new gym due to relocating. As I was only there for one comp as I finished the season with them I havent got the same bond with alot of the people but will remain in contact with some. What was nice though is a parent who helped me at comp with my eyelashes as im useless and my parents dont come to comps (im 20) she said whatever gym im at if they are at that comp she will help me.

Also at nationals I was speaking to a couple of girls on a team i am considering and they were telling me if I stay for a season or years they all remain good friends because their coach is happy when they are ready to go to the next level as they only offer a mini, junior 2 and senior 2 teams there.

 

[Jarod_allan]

Based on my experience, it upsets people when someone leaves a gym and then makes it a point to be rude and shove it everyone's face how much better off they are at their new gym. I had 2 friends leave a gym I used to cheer at and they sent my teammates and I constant messages about how much they had excelled in the 2 practices they had had with their new team. They also completely trashed our gym saying how bad and unsuccessful the program was (even though the program they went to was just starting their second year and didn't do too hot the previous year). And then later in the season, they were in such a huge rivalry with our entire program even though neither girl competed against any of our teams and they laughed at us if we didn't do well. That's why I took it personally.
I can completely understand and relate if someone just isn't feeling it at their current gym, but don't be obnoxious or rude about it. That's what I feel like upsets people most.

 

[Pebbles49]

Well, when my daughter and I left our old gym, we were warned that the worse would come to us for leaving. However, the opposite happened, the people at the old gym were so nice to us and jokingly chastised us for leaving, but we lost no friends and to be honest, in the beginning of the competition season, my daughter did not feel comfortable yet with her new team and at 1 weekend competition, spent all of her time with her old friends from the old gym. The parents from the old gym were always so welcoming and we all shared in cheering for each other children. Even one of the gym owner was extremely nice to my daughter and wish her good luck, so with all of these good encounters with the old gym people --I actually started to reconsider my decision to leave the gym and comeback!
So I strongly believe how the old gym treats outgoing members can hugely impact whether a person, if unhappy at the new gym, whether they will comeback and/or try a different gym instead...
PS: I believe, friendship should be a lot deeper than whether you go to the same gym for cheerleading... To be honest, some people are going about gym loyalty, no differently than joining a GANG! ("What"! Are you Bloods or Crips?) I don't think so!

 

[Cheer Dad]

However, on the same day I pulled my CP, another mother pulled hers. Not because they were moving but because she was switching her CP to a gym that did try-outs much later and is putting her daughter onto a higher leveled team (mini to youth).

Edited quote for size.

Does she understand the AGE doesn't determine level and a level 2 is really a level 2?


Feeling infamous today and laughing at some absurd statements spoken here and there

 

[darlingsmomx4]

Edited quote for size.

Does she understand the AGE doesn't determine level and a level 2 is really a level 2?


Feeling infamous today and laughing at some absurd statements spoken here and there

When we made our decision on our gym it was because at one gym she would be placed in the tiny group and the other gym a mini group. Yes both were level 1 groups but when deciding between a 3-5 group or a 5-8 group we thought she would be more challenged working with the older girls, kind of like a monkey see, monkey wanna do

 

[Cheer Dad]

When we made our decision on our gym it was because at one gym she would be placed in the tiny group and the other gym a mini group. Yes both were level 1 groups but when deciding between a 3-5 group or a 5-8 group we thought she would be more challenged working with the older girls, kind of like a monkey see, monkey wanna do

Unfortunately not everyone looks at it that way. Some just think older is higher.


Feeling infamous today and laughing at some absurd statements spoken here and there

 

[Keep_Believing]

Based on my experience, it upsets people when someone leaves a gym and then makes it a point to be rude and shove it everyone's face how much better off they are at their new gym. I had 2 friends leave a gym I used to cheer at and they sent my teammates and I constant messages about how much they had excelled in the 2 practices they had had with their new team. They also completely trashed our gym saying how bad and unsuccessful the program was (even though the program they went to was just starting their second year and didn't do too hot the previous year). And then later in the season, they were in such a huge rivalry with our entire program even though neither girl competed against any of our teams and they laughed at us if we didn't do well. That's why I took it personally.
I can completely understand and relate if someone just isn't feeling it at their current gym, but don't be obnoxious or rude about it. That's what I feel like upsets people most.

I promise we haven't. I did share on fierceboard about their growth and progress, but with the exception of posting a few pictures and 2 videos (can't help it proud mom) on Facebook I never bring up our new gym.

 

[CheerBank]

I promise we haven't. I did share on fierceboard about their growth and progress, but with the exception of posting a few pictures and 2 videos (can't help it proud mom) on Facebook I never bring up our new gym.

I don't think you posting things about your new gym is a slap in the face to the people at your old gym by any means. Some people however always seem to need to make things all about themselves, and therefore feel your girls' happiness is a dig at them. I pretty much unfriended almost everyone at my first gym after one person took a post personally that had nothing to do with them, and then shared it with and riled up everyone else. I did send those I was truly friends with a quick text that I was doing so, and it took a few years but we are all social media friends again.

The crazy thing is that my family is now used as an example as the "right" way to leave a gym by my first gym. They seem to have wiped clean from their memories the internet hate that was sent our way for a while.

 

[Keep_Believing]

I don't think you posting things about your new gym is a slap in the face to the people at your old gym by any means. Some people however always seem to need to make things all about themselves, and therefore feel your girls' happiness is a dig at them. I pretty much unfriended almost everyone at my first gym after one person took a post personally that had nothing to do with them, and then shared it with and riled up everyone else. I did send those I was truly friends with a quick text that I was doing so, and it took a few years but we are all social media friends again.

The crazy thing is that my family is now used as an example as the "right" way to leave a gym by my first gym. They seem to have wiped clean from their memories the internet hate that was sent our way for a while.

Thanks for sharing. Maybe time will make things better.

 

[CheerBank]

Thanks for sharing. Maybe time will make things better.

It will. But in the meantime focus on the positive. You're happy with the new program and more importantly, your girls are!


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[Jarod_allan]

I promise we haven't. I did share on fierceboard about their growth and progress, but with the exception of posting a few pictures and 2 videos (can't help it proud mom) on Facebook I never bring up our new gym.

And that's totally fine! I don't think anyone would see a problem with that at all. I'm just saying that these particular girls were very in our faces about their new team and putting my teammates and I down. That's where I drew the line.

 

[SL&AM]

Edited quote for size.

Does she understand the AGE doesn't determine level and a level 2 is really a level 2?


Feeling infamous today and laughing at some absurd statements spoken here and there

TBH, I would say no. I know this is old, but I'm back from vacation now.

With this mom in general, her CP is perfect and everyone else just fills in. I wish I was joking, but I'm not.

In deciding between a Tiny team, Mini team, or Youth team for my CP since technically with a Sept birthday she could do any of the above, I went with what the coaches felt she fit best. I also wanted her to start flying (what she was doing on her team) with age appropriate bases instead of the older girl's because I feel like she's learned so much more control and technique with it not being easy to just throw her up in the air.

But in this mom's case, it's purely driven by this type of conversation:

"Oh what team is CP on?"
"Yeah, CP is on the mini's at xyz gym."
"Oh, well [insert name] made Youth..."

It's sad, but she's the type of cheer mom who made me hate going to our gym at times; and I'm not sad to see her go.

 

[Sharkie]

as a coach/former gymowner I Always feel hurt when someone leaves the program. I consider them as my kids and care about them and when they leave I Always wonder what might have happened that they no longer wanna stay, were they unhappy and was there anything I could do?

Sometimes there are kids that tell me they plan on leaving and give a reason why. Others come to practice and shout the whole "we're one family"-thing with their teammembers while in fact the day before they did tryouts at another team but don't tell anyone. then I Always feel like they are stabbing me in the back.

The past year I learned to see my team rather as a business i'm running, than a family. It helped me in coaching, but also with kids leaving, i see them as employees that apply for another job because they have different plans with their career.

good thing is, most kids that left, came back at one point

 

[CheerBank]

as a coach/former gymowner I Always feel hurt when someone leaves the program. I consider them as my kids and care about them and when they leave I Always wonder what might have happened that they no longer wanna stay, were they unhappy and was there anything I could do?

Sometimes there are kids that tell me they plan on leaving and give a reason why. Others come to practice and shout the whole "we're one family"-thing with their teammembers while in fact the day before they did tryouts at another team but don't tell anyone. then I Always feel like they are stabbing me in the back.

The past year I learned to see my team rather as a business i'm running, than a family. It helped me in coaching, but also with kids leaving, i see them as employees that apply for another job because they have different plans with their career.

good thing is, most kids that left, came back at one point

If you treat families you leave the right way, there is always a chance they will come back. If you act like an as$hat baby with a bruised ego, that door is closed forever.

 

[Pebbles49]

as a coach/former gymowner I Always feel hurt when someone leaves the program. I consider them as my kids and care about them and when they leave I Always wonder what might have happened that they no longer wanna stay, were they unhappy and was there anything I could do?

Sometimes there are kids that tell me they plan on leaving and give a reason why. Others come to practice and shout the whole "we're one family"-thing with their teammembers while in fact the day before they did tryouts at another team but don't tell anyone. then I Always feel like they are stabbing me in the back.

The past year I learned to see my team rather as a business i'm running, than a family. It helped me in coaching, but also with kids leaving, i see them as employees that apply for another job because they have different plans with their career.

good thing is, most kids that left, came back at one point

It is refreshing for a gym owner to have the feelings you described, especially the feelings that they are your kids, and I can now understand why you are treating the gym more as a business...TBH, before you added that last statement about treating the gym more as a business, I was going to suggest not to take kids leaving too 'personal.' Sometime what happen with people leaving can only be called the "the Grass is Greener" Syndrome. This can happen with people who have been at only one gym and hear about this other gym, who supposedly grooming all of these lvl5, which once they leave they find out different... It is good, you are keeping your cool and allowing these people to come back and not close the door to your gym to them and continue to make your brand a premium...(That is a compliment when people leave to go somewhere else, and comeback to your gym)
PS: Think of it as a brand taste testing - Pepsi versus Coke