OT New Random Thread Pt. 3

[ErinS]

Did not mean to twist your words. I thought you were implying history of discrimination or racial tensions in the gym... which is not true. Apologize for that, for sure. These imaginary "groups" have been around a while, for sure.

I was implying the exact opposite, which is why I also said its like its in poor taste and not meant in any harm at the same time. I've always liked that CEA was diverse. The pictures to me indicate that the girls must be extremely comfortable with each other for pictures like this to even be allowed to occur. Of course someone could be internally seething inside but from the outside it doesn't look that way.

At the end of the day my point all along , what's good for the goose has to be good for the gander. You can't get up in arms when a white girl does it, when for years now black girls have been doing it and people just lol and like the pictures. I would think that she thought it was okay and all in good fun because this is something that has been done for years with no apparent issue. She finally posts one and it blows up (albeit a week after she posted it).


Double standard.

 

[kristenthegreat]

Everyone is racist. Seriously. It's a sociological and psychological fact. Doesn't mean anybody is a bad person. If you are aware of your own internal racism, you are able to handle it like an adult. We're socialized to be racist, and that's not going to change any time soon.

So don't try to tell me that you're not racist, because the facts say differently. And like I said, if you're aware of it, you're less likely to be ignorant about the subject. And stop making this poor girl feel horrible about one comment made in poor taste. Because more than likely the people making the biggest deal out of it are the biggest hypocrites in this situation. It's called projection.

Does this mean I get two quote Avenue Q TWICE in one week on two different fierceboard threads? This must be some kind of record..

Everyone's a little bit racist today *doo doo doo doo, DOO DOO DOO DOO*...

I edited my other post to quote you, but I hadn't seen this yet. Then I really am going to work out. It is significantly more important to me to look good on my vacation than to debate what SE is doing.

Yes, it's still racist. It is racist to stereotype people by race, no matter who is doing it. I have always felt this way, and I will always feel this way. I don't need any elaborate sociology 101 blog posts about how people define racism. Forming a group based on stereotypes about races, and excluding people based on those stereotypes is racist. (and the hypocrisy is that it wasn't racist until the white girls club comment was made... Now all of a sudden something that's been going on for years is racist)

I'm not trying to debate this again. People asked what was hypocritical about this, so I'm answering.

I hope you didn't find my post to be antagonistic, because I was legitimately trying to understand what people found hypocritical and why. I've got the funny feeling (this board always gives me funny feelings. I don't know how I feel about that), that people were also using 'hypocritical' to refer to several different facets of this whole mini-saga.

I will say, I found the part about someone being deliberately excluded to be more harsh than the rest of what was going on.

I was implying the exact opposite, which is why I also said its like its in poor taste and not meant in any harm at the same time. I've always liked that CEA was diverse. The pictures to me indicate that the girls must be extremely comfortable with each other for pictures like this to even be allowed to occur. Of course someone could be internally seething inside but on the outside it doesn't look that way.

At the end of the day my point all along , what's good for the goose has to be good for the gander. You can't get up in arms when a white girl does it, when for years now black girls have been doing it and people just lol and like the pictures. I would think that she thought it was okay and all in good fun because this is something that has been done for years with no apparent issue. She finally posts one and it blows up (albeit a week after she posted it).


Double standard.

Interesting perspective, and I'd agree with you on this one. Also interesting that this was a WEEK old- like people had to do some digging to find it.

 

[Eyes On The Prize]

I have typed and deleted several posts already.... This one I am going to post:

I know this kid. I know mom, dad, and big sis. It infuriates me that something that was posted in jest... An inside joke amongst teammates... Has been twisted by others to be something it is not. It infuriates me that such a sweet girl is being beaten down by people who do not know her. I do not tolerate ANY form of racism in my home, and I let this one and her sister watch my kids. I did before, and I would do so this afternoon! (In fact, msteal, we could use an afternoon with no kids , if yours are free)

Those claiming to see a "pattern" or "history" of racial division with this team or gym are simply coming up with something that is not there. In fact, I can't think of a place where I had spent significant time that is more open to all than our gym.

What it boils down to is that those ACTUALLY involved, the girls of that team, love each other, and love her... (I haven't met anyone who doesn't love her that has met her). They don't have a problem, because there is no problem. The fact that there is more pressure on her than that vile, vulgar tumblr "author" is a real problem. The fact that this group of girls can laugh with each other and joke about their differences while being a team and LOVING each other says they are beyond worrying about it. If we use kid gloves when they are not necessary, we are CREATING a divide, instead of fixing one.

The internet is a crazy place, isn't it? I feel like Uncle Ben's famous quote is needed when it comes to the internet - "With great power comes great responsibility."

Even if it was an inside joke, I think it was bad judgement in posting it with that caption. Sometimes the internet isn't the place for inside jokes. They are inside jokes for a reason meaning that they aren't shared with the world. If we didn't have that back story and explanation from msteal, this definitely would've snowballed into something bigger.

In a way this is somewhat of a parallel with the Chola news article thread. Both pictures were taken out of context and thrust into the limelight with little to no background information. Both had aspects of a picture of a team that could be misconstrued as "racist" without that background story. The difference is in this situation we had an explanation from a person involved afterward.

I think the tumblr account instigated a lot of unnecessary drama around it. But like I said, as an outsider, I think the caption was a bit unnecessary, too. But that doesn't mean I think MsT's kid is a bad kid or a racist. Good people make bad decisions all the time. She just made a bad decision (IMO) that was brought to light in a not so nice way. I'm sure we've all made bad decisions that we are glad the world never saw. I know I have.

Unfortunately something like this happened to me when I was cheering - Back when Myspace was a thing I made a comment on someones picture that was.... looking back it was not in good taste. It was a comment to a former coach at the gym I was at (Gym A) who had switched to the gym next door (Gym B - literally right next door). The comment expressed how unhappy I was at Gym A and some of the questionable things that had been happening and how much I was hoping to switch to Gym B the next season. My coach at Gym A printed the comment off and at the end of practice that night, two weeks before our last competition, read part of it to the entire team. He left my name off of it but I felt he brought it up in such an immature way and thought it was unfair because it was taken out of context. Both of my parents coached there and I had been at that gym the longest out of everyone there - even some coaches (8 years). I knew kids looked up to me and I had a reputation of being a kind, thoughtful, responsible kid - I was held to a higher standard than all of the other kids because of my seniority and as the "coaches kid". My mom was also in that practice and heard the whole thing. Not knowing it was me, she commented on it and said how disappointed she was that someone on the team would say those things about their team. The team walked away from practice that night speculating who would've done that. Like many other kids, cheerleading was my entire life and I loved every second of it and how much I loved my teams but because of the parts of the comment that were omitted when read, the coach made it sound like I hated my team and everyone on it when I was frustrated with how the gym was ran. I can't tell you how much I cried and cried and cried and cried afterwards in private. It was a horrible feeling. I am already very hard on myself and what happened made it so much worse. The hardest part was owning up to it to my parents and then sitting in the coaches office apologizing to them the next day. (My happy ending was I got to go to Gym B the next season and was happy as a clam there!)

@mstealtoyou - I can imagine how your girl is feeling. After it all settled down I was able to relfect on what happened. It gave me a little more insight on how the internet works and how what I say can be misconstrued and used against me. I know people like to jump to conclusions on the internet without a care in the world of the real story. You cannot control what people do with the things YOU put on the internet but you can control what you put there. I also realized that everyone can see EVERYTHING you post on the internet. I learned to be a LOT more careful about what I posted. Even though the whole situation hurt a lot and caused a lot of frustration and grief, I walked away learning so much. Hopefully your daughter will be able to do the same and will try her best not to let it happen again. I don't think what she posted reflects anything negative about her - she sounds like a good kid who might've made a mistake. It's a tough learning experience. The fact that she is so upset about it speaks volumes to me. Its obvious she cares deeply about what has happened and isn't one of those types who post something that could've hurt peoples feelings and not care about the consequences. I have so much more respect for people like that. Sometimes people's reactions to their actions are more important than their original actions. How she handles it and what she walks away with shows more about her character than the original IG post or how it has been portrayed. Tell her to keep her head up. It will be ok.

As for tumblr - some tumblr's are there simply to cause drama. Just like some twitters are there to cause drama. When you're on tumblr you just roll your eyes, ignore them, and keep scrolling. I feel like tumblr is getting a bad rap because of a couple of bad seeds. Just ignore them and pity them knowing they have nothing better to do than help cause drama. I don't know about others but I want to do more with my life than that. Tumblr isn't all drama, sometimes it can be a great resource.

Eek sorry for the novel y'all. Back to job searching I go!

 

[Ashley]

I just saw wcss.tumblr.com and I'm more disturbed by the D1 disgusting post! I see post by kids separating themselves by race all the time, I'm just curious why this specific post has everyone so upset? A.R from Smoed does it in her IG but I haven't seen any backlash, I'm a minority and I'm not offended by any of this post, I wasn't offended by the chola theme practice either, but that's just me. I'm not saying it's right to post pictures like that in social media but I don't think it's fair to just pick on one kid when there's lots of kids posting stuff like that, ok my rant it over.

I don't think people were upset just that they separated themselves by race, but that there's something problematic about saying "white girls do it better," especially when white is the majority, privileged race. Regardless of intent, one should always be mindful of how others could interpret your comments.

Maybe that picture got picked up on tumblr because someone is a teal-hater. I don't know. It got posted here because she's the daughter of a well-liked and popular fierceboarder. It doesn't mean every other instance is okay and this one is not.

 

[NJ Coach]

I've never been on Tumblr a day in my life, and after reading this thread, I think it will probably stay that way.

 

[Official OWECheer]

The internet is a crazy place, isn't it? I feel like Uncle Ben's famous quote is needed when it comes to the internet - "With great power comes great responsibility."

Thought you meant Ben Pope for a sec lol.

 

[gofriars610]

Honestly, I'm exhausted by social media and teenagers. I'm so glad I didn't have to learn to navigate it appropriately as a child with an in-development brain. My own child said something on Twitter last year that got him in loads of trouble. He posted a very inappropriate joke. Some random person in a different state apparently searches Twitter for a word he used and saw it, reposted it, and he and many, many other people crucified my son verbally on the Internet. They also sent a screen shot of the tweet to every admin, athletic director, and coach in our school district. Because my son (who actually didn't play any school sports for a year previously) identified himself on Twitter (at some point, they dug deep) as an athlete and as a student of his school, he was put on athletic suspension and ultimately was unable to play any school sports during his senior year. Tough lesson about social media.

That.......is absurd.

 

[SmileCat]

I have to write an Ethics paper about ethical issues in my future career (sports marketing). I chose cheerleading because that's what I hope to stay with and some ideas I have are the issues created by Susie's mom and maybe something about the huge age differences on senior teams can lead to something?
Any one else have any ideas? I only have to choose one issue so if theres anything ethical out in the cheer world that I forgot about? Thanks!!

 

[crazzyeyesassypants]

I don't think people were upset just that they separated themselves by race, but that there's something problematic about saying "white girls do it better," especially when white is the majority, privileged race. Regardless of intent, one should always be mindful of how others could interpret your comments.

Maybe that picture got picked up on tumblr because someone is a teal-hater. I don't know. It got posted here because she's the daughter of a well-liked and popular fierceboarder. It doesn't mean every other instance is okay and this one is not.

Hmm, I think if she would have posted "White girls club" people would still be upset, from what I'm reading it was an inside joke with the whole squad. I have inside jokes with my black friends and white friends about our race all the time, we are comfortable because we are friends and we just laugh it off. The girls shouldn't be posting it on social media because it's a joke between them and now everyone is going to have an opinion about, I'm just glad that social media wasn't around when I was a teenager. I couldn't imagine being crucified by a joke I made and thought at the time it was funny.

If people on fb knew it was my kid I would have preferred a private message though, instead of publicly putting it out there for more people to know about it.

 

[Official OWECheer]

Honestly, I'm exhausted by social media and teenagers. I'm so glad I didn't have to learn to navigate it appropriately as a child with an in-development brain. My own child said something on Twitter last year that got him in loads of trouble. He posted a very inappropriate joke. Some random person in a different state apparently searches Twitter for a word he used and saw it, reposted it, and he and many, many other people crucified my son verbally on the Internet. They also sent a screen shot of the tweet to every admin, athletic director, and coach in our school district. Because my son (who actually didn't play any school sports for a year previously) identified himself on Twitter (at some point, they dug deep) as an athlete and as a student of his school, he was put on athletic suspension and ultimately was unable to play any school sports during his senior year. Tough lesson about social media.

Was the joke that bad?

 

[amy1k]

I can't remember exactly what my son posted. There was a hashtag going around with his friends...something like #whydogirls(I can't remember). He responded to the hashtag "because they want to get raped." Totally inappropriate and not funny. I saw it, discussed it with him, and made him remove it and punished him (I don't recall the punishment). I also had random internet people follow me, insult my parenting ability, and tell me that parents like me are responsible for raising rapists. I just...ugh. I don't like the Internet.

Eta: his tweet was made after I went to bed, I saw it in the morning. I monitor my kids carefully on social media.

 

[CheerBank]

I can't remember exactly what my son posted. There was a hashtag going around with his friends...something like #whydogirls(I can't remember). He responded to the hashtag "because they want to get raped." Totally inappropriate and not funny. I saw it, discussed it with him, and made him remove it and punished him (I don't recall the punishment). I also had random internet people follow me, insult my parenting ability, and tell me that parents like me are responsible for raising rapists. I just...ugh. I don't like the Internet.

Eta: his tweet was made after I went to bed, I saw it in the morning. I monitor my kids carefully on social media.

We had a similar incident at cp's high school last month involving a photo posted on social media that went viral. Good kids who did something very stupid. Our high school initally responded to the public outcry - and the media - and then correctly modified their position because things were just getting out of hand.

 

[amy1k]

Incidentally, recently in another school district in my state, a boy was arrested for rape and then allowed to play in the football game that week. So...

Still. Stupid thing for my son to say. Don't underestimate the power of social media.

 

[Official OWECheer]

I've never been on Tumblr a day in my life, and after reading this thread, I think it will probably stay that way.

Marked this funny because some of the things I saw on Tumblr were just... creepy.

 

[Ally13]

... I'm just glad I don't follow any cheer tumblrs. The gymnastics ones are crazy enough. Kinda over tumblr in general.

Anyways, I got an 83 on my other accounting test. Kinda disappointed because I could have done better and I made a lot of silly mistakes, but it's better than my last one.

Now to go study for finance.. so ready for this semester to be over.

 

[CharlotteASMom]

I can't remember exactly what my son posted. There was a hashtag going around with his friends...something like #whydogirls(I can't remember). He responded to the hashtag "because they want to get raped." Totally inappropriate and not funny. I saw it, discussed it with him, and made him remove it and punished him (I don't recall the punishment). I also had random internet people follow me, insult my parenting ability, and tell me that parents like me are responsible for raising rapists. I just...ugh. I don't like the Internet.

Eta: his tweet was made after I went to bed, I saw it in the morning. I monitor my kids carefully on social media.

If you don't mind me asking, how old is your son? We are going through some issues right now that are causing me to debate the level of monitoring to do with the 15 year old. I am even considering making her shut some things down. I check her social media accounts 1-2 times a week and haven't seen any issues so far but know that can change quickly.