Crickets....

Discussion in 'High School Cheerleading' started by OldskoolKYcheercoach, Aug 13, 2019.

  1. CoachTamara

    CoachTamara Slow your roll, Sparkle.

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    People aren't losing their minds yet? I'm in full "what was I thinking at try outs?!" mode. So much regret, so much laziness everywhere... I always think things will be different, and they never are.

     
  2. oncecoolcoachnowmom

    oncecoolcoachnowmom Bestest Newbie '14

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    Yes they did. If I was getting injured or my safety was at risk, I am sure they would have let me quit, but as far as just not liking it? No. I also think that them teaching me a lesson about begging to sign up for things just because my friends were doing it.


    Yo be fair, I think quitting an activity if it is causing an actual injury is fine. Ex: There are some kids who after x seasons, their knees couldn't take another and that is fine. You only get one body.

    See, I like having a schedule, and I also have very set work hours so moving schools and constantly changing activities does not work for me. My husband also has a new position that requires evenings, so drop of a dime schedule changes do not work for him either. I do know people who will accommodate changes on kid request, but we do not. Ex: If mine asks to be in after school karate, and I sign him up for it, he is in afterschool karate til the end of the session (six weeks.) That is what works with when we get off work. I can't (for example) drop karate two weeks in and let him do swimming just because he decides he hates karate in the middle of it. Swimming is on a really inconvenient night that we did not plan for. Sorry. Sad life kiddo!
     
  3. OldskoolKYcheercoach

    OldskoolKYcheercoach There are Cheeropedia articles about me!

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    I was there two weeks ago, but I think I had just killed my kids with a hellacious two weeks coming back from our state-enforced dead period. School started last week and we’ve been on point the last six practice days.
     
  4. DonnaM

    DonnaM I Fierce Board instead of work/study

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    Well, we met with a sports chiropractor who works with the university team, and he wants her to focus on rehab for the next couple of months. After discussion with the coaches, she is leaving the team for now. She is welcome to come back later in the season if the doctor thinks her knees are up to it. The difference between someone who works with cheerleaders and the pediatric orthopedist (who felt she didn’t need to limit her activity and that it was just a growth spurt) was dramatic. Lots of tears, all around. I don’t know how I feel, either.
     
  5. CheerItFullOut

    CheerItFullOut When all else fails.... I shimmy

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    I’m hearing a lot about kids not having a smidge of drive...
    there was a kid in our district who quit varsity to be on fROSH because her friends were there and she didn’t like how many cheers she had to learn on varsity?!?! SMH
    The other day we were in cheer class and a freshmen kid came in asking where study hall was- we told her directly upstairs above us and she proclaimed how stressful finding classes were and how she was just going to call Her mom to pick her up because she was getting overwhelmed with finding her classes.
    How is this child going to function as an adult some day ...?!
     
  6. CoachTamara

    CoachTamara Slow your roll, Sparkle.

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    I look at some of the seniors I had last year as they are about to move out to start college and I have no idea how they'll ever function without their moms. Mommy does everything for them! Want to skip practice? Mom says you're sick. Don't like cheering in the rain? No worries, Mommy will lie for you to get you out of it. I'm trying to figure out the balance and adjust my coaching to work with these kids, but most days I want to give up.
     
  7. OldskoolKYcheercoach

    OldskoolKYcheercoach There are Cheeropedia articles about me!

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    I’m experiencing just the opposite for the most part. Actually had to go to the principal and AD and request our own bus because the girls begged me to let them all cheer all of our football games. We normally all cheer home games and split the team in 1/2 so that we can share a bus with the fresh football players on away games.
     
  8. ErinS

    ErinS Slow your roll, Sparkle. World Champion GIF Poster

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    I’m a former coach and I’m curious how other coaches would handle is. Since the child in question is my niece obvious my opinion is more emotional.

    My niece is 14 (just turned) and going to 9th grade. She cheered JV for her high school in 7th grade and in 8th grade made varsity. She’s not a tiny child on varsity for the sake of it, she’s a base, threw a full last year, based the elite part of the pyramid and pulled her weight. Currently in 9th grade she’s throwing a two to full and a full thru to full. Point for jumps. Bases elite part of pyramid. 5 passes in the routine She pulls her weight (and IMO overworked).

    Last week her coach had her fly in baskets. While she can fly in single leg stunts, she’s never been a “flyer flyer”. She was dropped in a basket toss Thursday and hit her head. She was checked out by the trainer and had 17/22 concussion symptoms and the trainer said she needed to see a doctor the following morning. My sister instead took her to the ER that night. She had a CT. She was diagnosed by a physician as having a concussion. Throughout this the coach never reached out to my sister or checked on my niece.

    Last night this exchange went on in the teams group me [​IMG]

    My sister sent it to the coach and principal (principal replied—-coach did not). My niece text the coach and quit—-an emotional response but again she’s 14, and these 3 girls are seniors with two of them being captains. I absolutely see this as bullying and intimidation and it’s concerning that these teenagers are telling other children to “think of the team before going to the hospital “. I’m at the point where if she truly wants to quit she should. There’s a lot of negligence and apathy going around (from teammates and coach) and as of last night my niece is refusing to go back to practice (which I can respect. Clearly no one is protecting her)

    The coach also did not reply to my niece’s text

    How would you all handle this?




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    Last edited: Aug 19, 2019
  9. retiredl5cheer

    retiredl5cheer Slow your roll, Sparkle.

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    I'd probably let my child quit too. The fact that the coach never reached out is a red flag to me.
     
  10. coacha

    coacha I Fierce Board instead of work/study

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    Concussion training/identification is serious business here in my state. Concussion protocol has to be followed before a trainer will release a player, and if a trainer says she needs to see a doctor, they will not be cleared to play here until they are cleared by a medical professional. (I've had kids out for weeks, some months, until they finish the return to play protocol for concussions.) So from that perspective, the coach needs to reiterate to the team that brains are serious business and you aren't a "trooper" for toughing it out.

    Having said that, I've had girls to try to quit on me in an emotional response to something that happens before. I don't let them. ;) We discuss the issue, attempt to come up with a solution, and above all give them time to make a decision based on something other than emotion. If they still want to quit, I won't stop them, but emotional quitting can end in regrets.
     
  11. CoachTamara

    CoachTamara Slow your roll, Sparkle.

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    I am the coach that doesn't reach out to each girl regarding their concussions. I talk to them in person, and send them to the trainer that is better equipped to handle them. First, a student with an actual concussion should not be on their phone or email AT ALL, and I will not text or email them to encourage that behavior. Second, we have a lot of girls that think any bump on the head equals a concussion and I have had MANY girls that will go to a doctor and claim a headache to get out of practices and school. I wish this weren't the case, but it's true. This does not sound like situation with your niece, but it's my biggest frustration every year. Faking an injury is not cute or funny, but it's the easiest way to get out of practice without getting kicked off the team. If I spent all of my time reaching out to each girl that was sick, injured, or sad about her boyfriend, I wouldn't have time to eat dinner at night. I try and limit all contact to the group app rather than individuals, and leave concussions and injuries to the trainer. I am not heartless and love my kids, I truly do, but I don't find this situation unusual. I believe the biggest problem is the group text and handling that would be my first priority.
     
  12. tojofasho

    tojofasho I'm an announcer on CBS for Worlds (or should be)

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    First of all, this whole situation is terrible and I'm sorry for your niece. This coach definitely fell short in some areas; however, with that being said, I think she was probably following the steps that she was told to. Here's a few procedures at my school that maybe this one has to follow as well.
    I, as the coach, am to send the athlete to the athletic trainer if they are injured. I am supposed to hear back from the athletic trainer on how to proceed. Most of the time, they tell me to call the parents, but occasionally they will do it themselves. I'm not supposed to "worry parents by calling for every bump and bruise". Head injuries are dicey, which is why the trainer is supposed to diagnose them and then tell the parents how to proceed. Normally I will reach out after the trainer has with a simple "how is ______ doing", but I am not supposed to tell them anything medical, essentially, and am only supposed to ask questions. So the coach dropped the ball checking on her for sure, but I don't think they did anything wrong when it comes to contacting you about the injury - at least where I work, that's the trainer's job specifically to stop coaches from over/under exaggerating symptoms.

    That group chat is toxic. I have had issues every single year with a "no coach" group chat (whether on GroupMe, text, Snapchat, insta, etc.) stirring up drama. It's a bad idea and I tell parents at the start of the year to warn their kids not to make one or engage, because it's outside of my jurisdiction since I'm not a part of it. Those messages are exactly why I do that, because kids are rude and brutal. I see you sent it to the coach and the principal, and then bring up that the principal responded but the coach didn't. Assuming this school runs the same way mine does, if a parent emails me and the AD/principal, I'm told not to respond. Instead I sit with the AD/principal and talk with them about the situation, and then they are the only one to reply. This is pretty standard for teachers/coaches/anything in between, so I have a feeling that's what happened there. I probably would've tried to pull the kid aside (unsure if the coach is also a teacher at her school to make this possible), but situations like this are super tricky to approach as the supervisor. Are the kids terrible? Yes, without a doubt. But if the coach doesn't have an ironclad social media policy that everybody has signed, there is nothing she can do to punish those rude kids without opening herself up to more issues.

    Coach not replying to niece's text is most likely an a-hole move unless her supervisor specifically told her not to respond, which is again, very possible. The major thing here in terms of communication is the coach is totally at fault for not initially checking in on your niece, but it's pretty likely everything after that was out of her control and she was told to leave the situation to the higher-ups. Again, maybe she really does just suck that badly, but from my years of coaching I've learned that nobody knows what goes on behind the scenes and it is a lot.

    Sorry for your niece, that's heartbreaking to be going through.
     
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  13. CoachTamara

    CoachTamara Slow your roll, Sparkle.

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    ALL OF THIS.

    My first year many girls made accusations towards other girls and then turned on me for my handling of it. I could do nothing. I couldn't respond, couldn't defend myself-nothing. I was not allowed to respond at all, and it was honestly the worst because I could easily say "I have this this and this proving that false, that's not the case" and I had to sit there while my name was run through the mud. Thankfully, the school was very aware of all of the details and I had a great team of parents that knew things didn't add up, but it was a nightmare. You have no idea what a pain the school policies can be until you are in the middle of it.
     
  14. ErinS

    ErinS Slow your roll, Sparkle. World Champion GIF Poster

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    Interesting. I know what the Cheer handbook and district handbook says regarding contact and injury so it’s interesting to see how the expectation of communication varies

    The coach replied to her early this morning and my sister as well.

    The girls reached out and apologized...but I don’t I don’t how well it’ll be received (14 year old ) so we’ll see

    I’m an educator so I know these years are hard enough without your teammates effectively bullying you so we’ll see what happens.


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  15. ErinS

    ErinS Slow your roll, Sparkle. World Champion GIF Poster

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    I actually a teacher and I’m a former coach in the same district which is why I’m cringing a lot about what is going on...because I know policy and protocol and I’m trying to separate professional from family....but I know as well as my colleagues what happened isn’t how it should have happened. But as a former coach I also know how hard it is to coach and things happen... and that parents are parents of their children so yeah.

    The coach is a former teacher. One year in the classroom and then decided to leave the classroom.

    I just hate it’s going on


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