All-Star End Of Year Awards Banquet?

[WICheerMom]

Looking for input?
So my daughter has cheered for a gym the past 3 years and has been a crossover the last 2 years. We completed the season with a Year End Banquet/Awards scheduled 5 weeks after our last competition. During that time we decided to check out other gyms where she participated in clinics as well as tryouts. Before we confirmed with any gym and less than a week before the Banquet, my family was UNINVITED to the event. My family is not the only one in this situation either... multiple familes have been personally called by the cheer director to be uninvited as they feel it is a conflict of interest. Other athletes that have moved onto a rec or school program have NOT lost their invite. It is my understanding that it is only those families that have tried out at other competitive allstar programs that they are aware of (as some people have kept that type of information more private). We have purchased a fancy dress for my daughter and she has been looking forward to this event for a long time as we ADORE our cheer family/friends. We are the type of people who have even shared a hotel room with a close friend that wears another gym's uniform at a competition... because we love the people. We are the type of people that go up to the VIP area at a competition to cheer for friends with other gyms... because we support the athletes. We would NOT go to the Banquet to try and pull others away from that gym! WE are so hurt by this and I want to know what other cheer people in other areas think of the situation. Is this a normal business practice? Should I have expected this?

 

[alexacheer2010]

Looking for input?
So my daughter has cheered for a gym the past 3 years and has been a crossover the last 2 years. We completed the season with a Year End Banquet/Awards scheduled 5 weeks after our last competition. During that time we decided to check out other gyms where she participated in clinics as well as tryouts. Before we confirmed with any gym and less than a week before the Banquet, my family was UNINVITED to the event. My family is not the only one in this situation either... multiple familes have been personally called by the cheer director to be uninvited as they feel it is a conflict of interest. Other athletes that have moved onto a rec or school program have NOT lost their invite. It is my understanding that it is only those families that have tried out at other competitive allstar programs that they are aware of (as some people have kept that type of information more private). We have purchased a fancy dress for my daughter and she has been looking forward to this event for a long time as we ADORE our cheer family/friends. We are the type of people who have even shared a hotel room with a close friend that wears another gym's uniform at a competition... because we love the people. We are the type of people that go up to the VIP area at a competition to cheer for friends with other gyms... because we support the athletes. We would NOT go to the Banquet to try and pull others away from that gym! WE are so hurt by this and I want to know what other cheer people in other areas think of the situation. Is this a normal business practice? Should I have expected this?

I'm so sorry this happened to you, but I'm not terribly surprised either. A lot of owners seem to feel betrayed when girls leave the gym. I'm in no way saying that's okay, because personally I think it's catty and high
schoolish. Unfortunately it seems like a lot of people in the industry don't want to realize that the cheer gym is a product and when other gyms are offering a better product, it's inevitable that some people will go to gym #2. I think I would use this opportunity to teach your daughter about being the bigger person because it seems like you already know that the gym owner is acting childish.
When my sister and I left my old gym it wasn't pretty. Fortunately I have been able to keep a decent relationship with the old coaches, but my sister has not. You just need to realize that while YES it's wrong and unfair, it's not only your gym who does this.
Just my two cents!

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[quitthedrama]

It never ceases to amaze me how many gym owners pour gasoline and light a match on their own bridges. Your CP is entitled to go to her banquet, as it is a celebration of this past season - regardless of what her plans are for next season. The fact that she was uninvited is unprofessional and down-right rude, but as @alexacheer2010 said, it is not the least bit surprising given the behavior of other gym owners that I have seen and heard about. It is a shame for the kids though - they are the ones that get hurt by this ridiculous behavior.

 

[BigBow]

People can be so bitter! Our gym got bought out by another program, and is having tryouts this week under a new name, and we are still having our end of year banquet, as our old gym, this Sunday. We've had staff quit, kids go to different gyms, new staff hired, and new faces in the gym these past 3 weeks, yet we are still coming together one last time to celebrate the END OF SEASON! People need to realize that banquets are not "kickoffs" for next season. You were loyal to the program all year, and just because you're going someplace new, doesn't mean you and your daughter shouldn't be able to celebrate her, her team's, and her gym's achievements over the PASSED SEASON. People are crazy.

 

[Chayse Alexandria]

If this happened to me, I'd go anyway. Who are they to tell me I can't come to an event to celebrate my months of hard work and dedication, regardless of what my future plans would be. Especially since I was a PAYING costumer. To me, this just does not seem fair to your daughter, your family, and the other families being affected.

 

[Mom2K]

The same thing happened to us when we were about to switch programs several years ago. Cp was banned from the banquet that we had paid for, and received extremely negative text messages from the owner. Their standard operating procedure over the years has been to paint the more successful gyms in the area as terrible, awful places where your child could not possibly survive. Mine was told she would never make it at our current gym. Another girl told they would "chew her up and spit her out." Both have done quite well by the way.

I was pretty stunned by this behavior at the time. These were the same people who had talked about how much they loved my kid, and we were all "family." The ones who called us when they needed help around the gym. I think they thought we'd be there forever, no matter what.

My only regret is that we didn't leave earlier.

 

[WICheerMom]

If this happened to me, I'd go anyway. Who are they to tell me I can't come to an event to celebrate my months of hard work and dedication, regardless of what my future plans would be. Especially since I was a PAYING costumer. To me, this just does not seem fair to your daughter, your family, and the other families being affected.

Unfortunately there would not be a place for us to sit as seats are assigned. Although I know friends would share a seat with my daughter... she no longer cares to go somewhere she is unwanted and does not want to have that type of negative attention. She went to a Birthday Party for a girl at that gym this past weekend and has already encountered an old teammate that continuously brought up the fact that she is "no longer welcome" and that she is "no longer with them". Now 1 sarcastic 14 year old didn't ruin her fun with the other girls she will continue to call FRIENDS... but it did bother her and she won't put herself in that type of situation again.

 

[Mama Of 3 CP's]

After reading your post I was going to reply that your gym's behavior is not typical. After reading the replies I am clearly wrong!

My girls have cheered at two gyms. Neither one disinvited nor made people feel unwelcome that were leaving for another allstar gym. I think your gym made a huge mistake in having the banquet so long after the last competition. I think it needs to be the following week (I get gyms that have teams that attend Worlds and Summit have to make other plans) so that the team is still bonded from the season and girls have not done visits or clinics at other gyms. The gym owner is clearly not confident in her program to do that to customers. If she was, she would not have burned the bridge for your daughter to potentially return one day or you to ever recommend the gym to someone who you think is a match for the old gym.

We are switching to a new gym this season. One of my daughters has out grown our gym. While my other two haven't, I feel I need to move them all to keep my sanity this next season. While the owner and coaches may have felt hurt and sad, there were no unkind words said.
Last night a friend from the first gym my girls went to asked my thoughts on three local gyms: the gym we just left, one I don't know much about and the one we are starting at. I think the one we just left is a great match for her kids' abilities and drive. I was able to give her an abundance of information and insight into the program. They may get two new athletes because of it. If there had been any unkind words when we departed, I would not have recommended the gym.

 

[addicted2cheer]

consider is a HUGE gift to you that they did it. They are small and petty for acting that way.. a true reveal of their character. If they are willing to be this way would you really want them influencing your child? If they are so afraid of you seeing other gyms they are afraid of what their own product is. No one tells me where I can go as a paying customer once the season has ended. Move on and don't look back. Your true friends will be your friends. Good luck to you!

 

[addicted2cheer]

If this happened to me, I'd go anyway. Who are they to tell me I can't come to an event to celebrate my months of hard work and dedication, regardless of what my future plans would be. Especially since I was a PAYING costumer. To me, this just does not seem fair to your daughter, your family, and the other families being affected.

I totally agree with this but if they are petty enough to "uninvite" them then they will not have prepared any award or kind words for the child either.. so it could be very damaging for the child to be there and basically be ignored during the event while everyone else is being recognized. It's a terrible situation and ANY owners that would do this should be ashamed of themselves and seriously reconsider if they are doing what they are doing for the kids or the $.

 

[cheermuse]

Unfortunately, this behavior is so common place.
Just goes to show your old gyms TRUE character.

 

[oncecoolcoachnowmom]

To the gym owner:

*you're

**apologies if you do not get the R. Kelly reference.

 

[ACEDAD]

Shouldn't be stunned, but I always am. What childish behavior by the gym owner.

 

[Cheer Dad]

Gyms and their owners will never cease to amaze mm both the good and bad spectrums.


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[CheerBank]

Maybe it is just me, but why would you want to go to the banquet of a gym you knew you were leaving?
When we decided we were changing gyms, we did not want to go the end of the year banquet. We had had enough of the coach, athletes and their parents, and to spend 2-3 hours in their company celebrating a season which cp and I pretty much suffered through would have been torture.