I see a lot of cheer parent threads so i thought I'd start one on what the coaches find good and bad about cheer parents. I personally am blessed with some amazing parents at the gym that I coach at, and want to share some of the things that make me love these parents.
Approaching/calling me when I'm not at the gym or at inconvenient times
I normally am at work at my dayjob at 4 A.M. in the morning, I just finished your daughter's practice at 8:30 PM, do the math for the amount of sleep I get? OK, not much. I just spent an hour and half coaching suzy (whom yes I do adore) and at this point at the night I have one thing on my mind after working 14 hours, getting to sleep, considering I need every bit of the 5 hours I might be able to get if I hurry on. Or I might be going to coach another tumbling class. While I won't be rude to you, you need to understand that even though I will explain why I do this or that in practice or asking how your child did or asking why they had to run laps more than the other girls, I won't be giving you the response you deserve (I believe you should be educated as much as you pay) because I don't have any more energy to focus on my job anymore. It is better to ask me before the start of the next practice, or to text me the next mornign asking if I could call you or meet you. Let me do things on my time, because I am a VERY busy person and I do try to have a life.
The parents I love always do this, or at least ask me if I'm busy before they assume I'm not. They stay in regular contact with me, but realize that generally any time after I am done working for the day is a bad time. Also, if you want a response for me, 11 oclock at night isn't the time for me, very rarely am I up that late (okay i have the mornign off so tonight doesn't count) and I will probably ignore your call and forget about it or read your text and forget about it.
Asking me why your child isn't doing xyz but not wanting the honest or obvious answer
While I understand that your suzy has always been a flier, this year it just isn't going to work out. She is a foot and half taller than the other four girls on the team that have also always flown. Yes they are younger, but even at a medium sized gym we can't always keep youth/junior kids off of our senior teams if they have the skills. In fact...... tumbling wise they deserve to be on the team more than your daughter, who has a roff tuck they learned somewhere else, but has refused for two seasons to work on improving her bhs so she can move on to layouts and fulls. While I wasn't your daughters coach before, I watched her at competitions, and know that she fell more than any other flier at competitions even with great bases, has the worst flexibility of any of the fliers, and generally just isn't as good. While I do think your daughter has potential to be a great cheerleader, I just don't think it is in flying. She is a great performer, jumper, and dancer, she needs to learn to base because it is the most realistic option. If she develops her tumbling she will go far. And even more, I HAVE been flying her in a numbers stunt and pyramid.
However, no suzie's mom wants to hear this. I have to sugarcoat it and choose my words carefully without being misleading so that this mom doesn't get even more angry and leave the program.
The parents that I love don't confront me angrily about why their daughter isn't flying or last pass, they ask me very politely what it is that their daughter can do to improve their skills. And then when I tell them how too, I don't have to put on a front and can speak honestly about how your daughter can improve. Nobodies feelings get hurt that way.
Cornering me/approaching me while I'm alone
I will always talk about things that are positive with you, but if you have a complaint about me, the other coaches, or gym management decisions, I will not speak to you about them at all unless it is my job to do so, and then not without a witness, preferably someone who is above me, i.e. the owner. Don't be offended when I won't answer your questions. Its really not personal, its just protecting myself from proffesional accusations and he said/she said gossip that while I hope and don't think you will make about me or say that I said, I'm not going to go through the inconvenience of clearing any situation up that could be avoided by having another party witness the conversation.
Also, never come to me complaining about my owners, because while I am not goign to say I agree with everything they do, they are good respectable people who also happen to sign my paycheck. I hold them in high regard as they have given me so many great oppurtunities, and i wouldn't be here without them.
My favorite parents aren't the ones who don't have complaints, but the ones who know how to handle them in a very professional way.
So to recap a long post, my favorite parents aren't perfect, but they know how to respect personal and professional boundaries, and realize that while I absolutely love your kids (which 99% of the time I do) that I might not be able to take the time that you choose to talk to me. I will fit you in, just be patient.
Feel free to add your own everyone.
Approaching/calling me when I'm not at the gym or at inconvenient times
I normally am at work at my dayjob at 4 A.M. in the morning, I just finished your daughter's practice at 8:30 PM, do the math for the amount of sleep I get? OK, not much. I just spent an hour and half coaching suzy (whom yes I do adore) and at this point at the night I have one thing on my mind after working 14 hours, getting to sleep, considering I need every bit of the 5 hours I might be able to get if I hurry on. Or I might be going to coach another tumbling class. While I won't be rude to you, you need to understand that even though I will explain why I do this or that in practice or asking how your child did or asking why they had to run laps more than the other girls, I won't be giving you the response you deserve (I believe you should be educated as much as you pay) because I don't have any more energy to focus on my job anymore. It is better to ask me before the start of the next practice, or to text me the next mornign asking if I could call you or meet you. Let me do things on my time, because I am a VERY busy person and I do try to have a life.
The parents I love always do this, or at least ask me if I'm busy before they assume I'm not. They stay in regular contact with me, but realize that generally any time after I am done working for the day is a bad time. Also, if you want a response for me, 11 oclock at night isn't the time for me, very rarely am I up that late (okay i have the mornign off so tonight doesn't count) and I will probably ignore your call and forget about it or read your text and forget about it.
Asking me why your child isn't doing xyz but not wanting the honest or obvious answer
While I understand that your suzy has always been a flier, this year it just isn't going to work out. She is a foot and half taller than the other four girls on the team that have also always flown. Yes they are younger, but even at a medium sized gym we can't always keep youth/junior kids off of our senior teams if they have the skills. In fact...... tumbling wise they deserve to be on the team more than your daughter, who has a roff tuck they learned somewhere else, but has refused for two seasons to work on improving her bhs so she can move on to layouts and fulls. While I wasn't your daughters coach before, I watched her at competitions, and know that she fell more than any other flier at competitions even with great bases, has the worst flexibility of any of the fliers, and generally just isn't as good. While I do think your daughter has potential to be a great cheerleader, I just don't think it is in flying. She is a great performer, jumper, and dancer, she needs to learn to base because it is the most realistic option. If she develops her tumbling she will go far. And even more, I HAVE been flying her in a numbers stunt and pyramid.
However, no suzie's mom wants to hear this. I have to sugarcoat it and choose my words carefully without being misleading so that this mom doesn't get even more angry and leave the program.
The parents that I love don't confront me angrily about why their daughter isn't flying or last pass, they ask me very politely what it is that their daughter can do to improve their skills. And then when I tell them how too, I don't have to put on a front and can speak honestly about how your daughter can improve. Nobodies feelings get hurt that way.
Cornering me/approaching me while I'm alone
I will always talk about things that are positive with you, but if you have a complaint about me, the other coaches, or gym management decisions, I will not speak to you about them at all unless it is my job to do so, and then not without a witness, preferably someone who is above me, i.e. the owner. Don't be offended when I won't answer your questions. Its really not personal, its just protecting myself from proffesional accusations and he said/she said gossip that while I hope and don't think you will make about me or say that I said, I'm not going to go through the inconvenience of clearing any situation up that could be avoided by having another party witness the conversation.
Also, never come to me complaining about my owners, because while I am not goign to say I agree with everything they do, they are good respectable people who also happen to sign my paycheck. I hold them in high regard as they have given me so many great oppurtunities, and i wouldn't be here without them.
My favorite parents aren't the ones who don't have complaints, but the ones who know how to handle them in a very professional way.
So to recap a long post, my favorite parents aren't perfect, but they know how to respect personal and professional boundaries, and realize that while I absolutely love your kids (which 99% of the time I do) that I might not be able to take the time that you choose to talk to me. I will fit you in, just be patient.
Feel free to add your own everyone.
