High School How To Handle An Attempted Suicide

[CHS Cheer Coach]

We have a girl who just recently attempted suicide. She will be coming back to the team in about a week or so and I am not sure how to approach the situation. The team does not know (per request of the family) what happened. We told them she had medical issues. I am wondering as a coach how we treat her when she comes back... Do we act like nothing happened? Do we tell her we are here for her? What do we do? And if the team finds out what actually happened how do we help them handle it?

 

[Alvin Tran]

This is such a sensitive subject that I'm afraid to step foot in, but in my opinion, I would talk to her in private first before practice, and see how she feels and see if she wants to keep it private. Just start out casual and be like "how have you been? We missed you at practice" and if she is comfortable to mention it, then dive deeper. If she seems to not want to talk about it, then just act normal and send her back to practice and just casually mention "we are here for you".
These are just my 2 cents

 

[Cheer Dad]

Alvin has a good idea, I would also contact the school psychologist or counselor to get an idea on how to proceed as well. It could be something they are willing to help you with.




**But I saw it on the Internet, it must be true**

 

[Tealxblack25]

I actually went through this in 2013. I have a post on here asking for prayers so I feel comfortable speaking on this topic.

The best thing you could do is approach her privately and tell her not to feel obligated to tell the girls as to why she was out. They're kids and they will be wondering. When shes ready, she'll be ready (for if she does want to tell them)

When my athlete came back we actually surpirsed the team at competition and they attacked her out of joy and huddled around her. In this case where the girls dont know what happened, they might not do that but in the off chance they do - just be careful with that. There could be possible PTSD or anxiety that accompany surviving a suicide attempt. It could make her feel overwhelmed.
It might be in her best interest for the team to act normal and act like nothing happened but also let her know when she is ready to talk she has a team behind her and that are there for her.

My incident with this happened in 2013 and it made our team closer and the bond the girls formed together still stands and has carried over into our high school team because 2 years as gone by and the girls are very close and its more like a family than it was before.

Good luck to you, your team, and your athlete<3
Hanna

 

[CHS Cheer Coach]

Alvin has a good idea, I would also contact the school psychologist or counselor to get an idea on how to proceed as well. It could be something they are willing to help you with.




**But I saw it on the Internet, it must be true**

I'm not sure why I never thought of talking to the school counselor. I'm not sure at this point how much the school knows about the situation, if any, so I will need to check with her mom first to see. It is so hard hearing one of your athletes wants to end her life. We are all still trying to figure out what triggered this. She is telling her counselor at the hospital that she just wants to die still.

 

[Doctorcheer]

I would get a release of info to talk to the psychologist. Some kids do it cause they are so depressed others like those who have symptoms of borderline personality disorder do it more for attention. Depending on what the psychologist thinks is the true motivation behind it might determine how you deal with her. If it's attention seeking you don't want to reinforce that behavior. But only her psychologist has that information

 

[Cheer Dad]

I would get a release of info to talk to the psychologist. Some kids do it cause they are so depressed others like those who have symptoms of borderline personality disorder do it more for attention. Depending on what the psychologist thinks is the true motivation behind it might determine how you deal with her. If it's attention seeking you don't want to reinforce that behavior. But only her psychologist has that information

Sorry to ask, but do you think a parent is going to allow the coach to speak to the daughters psychologist?

If my child I would not allow that, but that is just me.


**But I saw it on the Internet, it must be true**

 

[Doctorcheer]

Sorry to ask, but do you think a parent is going to allow the coach to speak to the daughters psychologist?

If my child I would not allow that, but that is just me.


**But I saw it on the Internet, it must be true**

You'd be surprised as a psychologist, I've had parents sign releases of information for many agencies and individuals. I think it would be a good idea to get a coach on board. The psych will only reveal what is relevant to the treatment of the client and that person/agency.

 

[Cheer Dad]

You'd be surprised as a psychologist, I've had parents sign releases of information for many agencies and individuals. I think it would be a good idea to get a coach on board. The psych will only reveal what is relevant to the treatment of the client and that person/agency.

I'm just amazed at that.

I can understand a release for some cases but I doubt I would ever sign a HIPAA release for a sports coach.


**But I saw it on the Internet, it must be true**

 

[catlady]

I would let the parents know your concern, they can talk to the psychologist and convey what the Dr. feels is the most appropriate way for you all to welcome her back. I, personally, would be careful in asking outside sources just in case there is not a "one size fits all" approach.

 

[CHS Cheer Coach]

I would let the parents know your concern, they can talk to the psychologist and convey what the Dr. feels is the most appropriate way for you all to welcome her back. I, personally, would be careful in asking outside sources just in case there is not a "one size fits all" approach.

I am just trying to get some ideas of different ways to handle it. Each person is going to have a different approach and I am taking in ideas and figuring out what I feel will be the best way after talking with my assistant coach and her mom and based on what I know about my athlete. I agree that there is more than likely not a "one size fits all" approach. I just figured I would reach out to other cheer people that maybe have dealt with this type of situation or similar.

As for talking to the psychologist, I wasn't necessarily planning on talking to her specific psychologist at this point (one reason is they are 5 hours away from us right now) but just talking it over with the school counselor and getting some tips from them on different ways to handle that type of situation as well. I really appreciate everybody's input! I am considering everything and figuring out what best fits the needs of my athlete.

 

[CHS Cheer Coach]

Sorry to ask, but do you think a parent is going to allow the coach to speak to the daughters psychologist?

If my child I would not allow that, but that is just me.


**But I saw it on the Internet, it must be true**

I think for me it would depend on what the situation was. If the coach was able to help out to make them more stable I think I would allow a limited release or talk to the psychologist and have them write a letter to the coach on some tips to help my child.

 

[Keep_Believing]

Does the girl know that the family shared what happened with you?

 

[CHS Cheer Coach]

Does the girl know that the family shared what happened with you?

I'm not positive but I'm pretty sure. That's another factor as to how to handle it. Which I can check with the mom to see if she does know or not.

 

[Keep_Believing]

I worked with one student whose family shared their son's suicide attempt with me. He was never aware I knew about it.