All-Star It's Hard...

[cljacks99]

Too funny! I was officailly a crazy third year mom last year. This is my cp's 4th year and for whatever reason, I am honestly not nearly as frazzled this year. I am more relaxed and I know that she is going to do her job now. Last year was definitely the peak of my psychosis. So glad that is over!

 

[mommy2mygirls]

How do you recommend building that trust?

I guess that is where my problem is.

 

[ufomom]

It will get better the longer she is in cheer . Hang in there! I wish I could find that little blurb I wrote a few years back about the "stages of cheer moms"....lol.

May I recommend finding someone you can completely confide in who is not in your gym? @Mclovin and I vent to each other ALL THE TIME and have for 8 years. We don't attend the same gym (we both moved away from our first gym at the same time to different states), and we can safely vent to each other without upsetting anyone because she doesn't have a clue who I am venting about, and vice versa. It helps get things off your chest without pissing anyone off lol.

Excellent advice. Keep your mouth shut until you are in the car alone and then DIAL YOUR FRIEND! I have my buddies too.

 

[cheergirlbrey]

hey..pm me if you need to...I left a gym last year and oh boy the drama...:/

There's drama when we leave gyms LOL. We just left our gym after 5 yrs and I feel ya! But we are soooo excited to be a little fish in the big sea!!!
Now for the keep your mouth shut thing....for me its just personality and I gotta try and work on it. Good luck this season!

 

[katstat1]

I think that is a great idea to have someone to vent to that is totally unassociated with your gym, but can understand your frustrations. I don't post much on here, but read it ALL THE TIME. I don't really know any of you, but definitely would like to get to know more people. I'm here for the long haul, I think anway, cp is 10, so I would like a good fierceboard friend(s).

 

[mstealtoyou]

Agreed...I am working really hard on that. We've only been there one season - going into season two right now.
I have trust issues! lol

Message me, you can vent to me and I promise not to share with anyone at your gym. LOL Or anyone for that matter. And having someone to rant and rave to in the crazy moments will help you feel better. Believe me!!! I do it all the time with my out of state cheer mom friends and they do it with me. We can have our say but it doesn't make us look crazy at the gym. And we would some days.

We all need a shoulder. Just reach out.......message someone.......that's part of what makes the Fierceboard so great. We all have been through and can sympathize with how your feeling.

Good Luck!

 

[Mclovin]

I guess that is where my problem is.

#1 - Realize that not EVERYTHING is going to be the way you want it or like it.

#2 - Sit down and ask yourself what are the ABSOLUTE essentials in a cheer gym for your family. For me, more than anything else, it was the morals and ethics taught in the gym. As competitive as I am, and as much as I hate to lose, more than anything else I want to know that my girls are being taught BY EXAMPLE to be Godly people.

#3 - Be open and honest with the coaches and owner that you are a little worried about XYZ and ask them what their plan is to help alleviate your concerns. I have learned that communication is the key to trust.

 

[HCKayla]

I'm willing to chat with anyone as well, just PM me.

 

[mstealtoyou]

Excellent advice. Keep your mouth shut until you are in the car alone and then DIAL YOUR FRIEND! I have my buddies too.

ufomom gives great advice! GREAT advice!

 

[cheer*me*up]

I agree that it gets so much easier as time goes on. My daughter is 12 and has cheered for 7 years. This past season, she finally was able to be on senior level 5 and go to worlds. Part way through the season, she started talking about taking a year off to try different sports and go on a school trip out if the country. My husband and I helped guide her through this process; but ultimately, it was her decision. She did not try-out. A couple of years ago, I think I would have had a heart attack at the thought of her not cheering for a year after finally being on the team that she worked so hard to be on!! Now, however, I realize that there are other very important experiences in her life from which she will learn and grow. Hopefully, she will try out again next year. As a "cheer mom" I have changed and have become much more relaxed. Level5mom is so right about the states.

 

[mstealtoyou]

#1 - Realize that not EVERYTHING is going to be the way you want it or like it.

#2 - Sit down and ask yourself what are the ABSOLUTE essentials in a cheer gym for your family. For me, more than anything else, it was the morals and ethics taught in the gym. As competitive as I am, and as much as I hate to lose, more than anything else I want to know that my girls are being taught BY EXAMPLE to be Godly people.

#3 - Be open and honest with the coaches and owner that you are a little worried about XYZ and ask them what their plan is to help alleviate your concerns. I have learned that communication is the key to trust.

I would add another one

#4 - Is this situation a "Deal Breaker" for me? Meaning would you be willing to leave your program over it. If the honest answer is yes, then approach a coach/owner but you also have to be prepared for the answer. LOL

 

[CheerMomNTx]

ufomom gives great advice! GREAT advice!

She she does and what's even better is having someone to vent to and to be totally honest because they are not biased....they live out of state!!!

 

[CheerMomNTx]

It happens to the best of us at times but you have to sit back and reflect. Is it worth the amount of stress I am going through or my child? Can it be worked out without my input? Basically you have to learn to pick your battles!!! Good luck!!

 

[Just-a-Mom]

I'm so glad @Just-a-Mom had the right idea by deciding to vent to each other...all day...every day... and I'm extra glad to find out we're not the only ones that do it That's my homie.

:kiss:
Oh my gosh...you are not kidding! It's so helpful! And it's perfect that we don't know anyone at each other's gyms. She just gives me honest, frank (and sage...) advice and I don't have to worry that she's biased about any of it. Makes it soooo much easier when I find myself upset - I just tell her, and she says "OK, calm down. Lets look at this logically..." Not to mention the fact that this carries over into non-cheer aspects of life too.

@mommy2mygirls definitely find someone NOT AT YOUR GYM (plenty to choose from just in this thread ) to vent to. There is absolutely nothing wrong with getting upset or being a momma bear! Just finding someone who "gets it" is the key.

 

[mommy2mygirls]

I just love you all!! <3 <3 If I keep falling so in love with all of you on this board one of these days we are going to have to have a FierceboardMoms get together!! Thanks for keeping me sane... talking to people @ the gym seems to fuel the fire instead of calming it down and that is NOT what I want!