Stick with yes. That's fine. I'm just saying that you're wrong. I know for a fact that people have given great advice here whose daughters fly and it was never mentioned. Does some of that "nya nya. My daughters up and yours isn't" exist here? Absolutely. In this thread, though, it sure wasn't close to everybody.
This non flyer parent didn't feel I had much to offer. Unfortunately, I feel like my opinion as a base/backspot mom carries very little significance in a thread about flyers. At least that's been my experience.
I certainly did not mean it that way. I even mentioned that my daughter is a flyer by default. She is short 9 year old on a team (Jr 2) that mainly consists of 12-14 year olds. She is on a Jr 2 squad, and she honestly should be on a youth 1 squad. But our new gym only has 2 squads (Jr 2 and Sr 3).
I also mentioned that she truly isn't very good at it. I definitely was not bragging. Who brags that their daughter isn't a very good flyer? I was just trying to help the OP out by sharing our story with her. I do not know why non-flyer parents did not respond to this, but I have no control over that. I do feel that they could also help put their perspective to this situation, but it looks as though they have chosen not to. Hopefully, some of them will share their opinions/stories as well.
Non-flyer mom here. And I have a cp and a former cp who truly never wished they could fly. There really is no perspective to add except that I am very happy to have never been in the position of having an athlete who wanted to do something other than what they were doing only to be told that they were not the right body type for it so they couldn't even be given the chance to prove the coaches wrong.
I certainly did not mean it that way. I even mentioned that my daughter is a flyer by default. She is short 9 year old on a team (Jr 2) that mainly consists of 12-14 year olds. She is on a Jr 2 squad, and she honestly should be on a youth 1 squad. But our new gym only has 2 squads (Jr 2 and Sr 3).
I also mentioned that she truly isn't very good at it. I definitely was not bragging. Who brags that their daughter isn't a very good flyer? I was just trying to help the OP out by sharing our story with her. I do not know why non-flyer parents did not respond to this, but I have no control over that. I do feel that they could also help put their perspective to this situation, but it looks as though they have chosen not to. Hopefully, some of them will share their opinions/stories as well.
I agree that every position is important but like it was said of course your going to root for your daughter. Again I don't care what she does as long as she is happy. I am one of those people that have always operated that if I work hard enough to reach my goals I will achieve them. I know this situation is a little more complicated than that so at times it can be hard to know the right way to approach it with my daughter. As far as open gym we went last night and it was a mess. My daughter was trying to get some girls on her team that she considers friends to base her (they have done it in the past) but there were some older girls there and they started being catty. They lifted her for a second then purposely dropped her and said "we don't want to lift you anymore, your not even a flyer for this team." Daughter held it in pretty good and came out stone faced and asked if I could go to the restroom with her. She held it in till I shut the door then she started crying saying she thought they were her friends and making comments that she is too big. So basically that is what I am dealing with and being she is my only child I am still learning how to handle these situations. I asked her if she wanted to go home and she wiped her face and said no and just went out and started practicing on her tucks by herself. It just broke my heart.
If there was a 'stand up - slow clap' emoji, now would be the time to use it. This is it exactly. I'm so beyond tired of gyms telling me how to feel about my child's feelings. No, We don't feel honored just to walk into your place of business. Same way I don't feel honored shopping at Target. I pay you. My kid works her booty off. We expect everyone to be treated fairly. All positions are important? There's a reason all new families know what a flyer is and that it is the 'goal'. Let's just look,at the ratio of cheerlebs and position on the team. I'm putting money on the fact that is skewed toward the flyer. I liked watching my child fly. I LOVED watching her main base. It is our preference. But stop preaching that they are the same.Just my 2 cents (or 4 cents really) :
I find it interesting that the majority of the advice in this thread has been "the whole team matters most" and "tell her being a base is just as important", yet every single person whose child is a flyer made sure to get that info into their post. No wonder people new to the sport think being a flyer is the end all be all of cheer - from day one, everyone they meet is "Oh all the positions are equally as important. My CP is a flyer of course, but yours doesn't need to be!"
For what it's worth, OP: my CP was not a flyer. She was a back spot, and it took her quite far. One thing you and CP can remember: For every flyer on the team, they need 3 people under her. Quick math means on a small team they need 5 flyers and 15 bases. Therefore it's a whole lot easier for a base to move up to higher levels than a flyer, simply because there are more openings on the team. My CP made it all the way to a level 5 team based on stunting.
Not as lofty and angelic a way of looking at it, but probably more motivating than "you should just be proud you get to be there to hold my baby up while she shines."
Yes, the whole team matters, but it's ok to care about your child more. We all do - just no one admits it.
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I currently have a 10 year old in her first year doing all star cheer. She has a dream of wanting to fly and is pretty flexible. We have been taking flyer classes and she seems to be doing alright. She has no fear of being in the air and is holding decently considering she has only went to 4 or 5 classes. My question is her size. She wanted to fly for her team this year and basically was told she is too big and is "built like a base"....My daughter is by no means fat but she is very muscular because of her constant tumbling and being so active. Most of the girls they have flying are very skinny but have problems staying in the air ex. constant falling and lack of flexibility. She is currently 4"6 and weights 73 lbs. So does this seem like a deal breaker? Even if she is perfectly tight in the air and flexible would her size prevent her from being chosen? She is under the impression if she keeps working at it and gets it perfect they will let her fly
I currently have a 10 year old in her first year doing all star cheer. She has a dream of wanting to fly and is pretty flexible. We have been taking flyer classes and she seems to be doing alright. She has no fear of being in the air and is holding decently considering she has only went to 4 or 5 classes. My question is her size. She wanted to fly for her team this year and basically was told she is too big and is "built like a base"....My daughter is by no means fat but she is very muscular because of her constant tumbling and being so active. Most of the girls they have flying are very skinny but have problems staying in the air ex. constant falling and lack of flexibility. She is currently 4"6 and weights 73 lbs. So does this seem like a deal breaker? Even if she is perfectly tight in the air and flexible would her size prevent her from being chosen? She is under the impression if she keeps working at it and gets it perfect they will let her fly
I have appreciated everyone's input whether they have a child that flys or is a base. I'm sorry if this thread has caused any hard feelings or controversy between anyone
That whole middle school/early HS range makes for cattiness and it is tough, as it is prevalent anywhere. Who surrounds you can make all the difference between loving what you are doing or having a miserable time (both athletes, coaches & parents), so if you don't see a positive environment or supportive network in place (or the likelihood of getting there), then I would suggest you finish out this season with the current team, but do your research about other options in the area & go from there:
Absolutely! We just switched schools because the emotional abuse/social bullying had gotten so bad for my younger cp. It all started when she got co-captain for our school's cheer team instead of the captain's best friend. It was relentless and we got no support from our school.
