Switching Gyms?

[levelfivecheerleader]

My daughter is a level 5 cheerleader and decided to tryout for a worlds team about a month ago. She made the most prestigious worlds team at that gym, and she loves it!
After her switch, her old coach talked to her for about an hour, and they both ended up crying. He said she was always welcome back. As much as she loved the coach and gym, it was time for her to move onto a more developed gym.
She thought she had settled things with her old coach, and all was good. This is not the case. My daughters best friend is still on the team, and she repeatedly reports to my daughter that every practice the athletes, along with the coaches bash on my daughter! They say things such as she is lying about making the team she did, making remarks about her work ethic (even though before the coach would always comment on how my daughter was the hardest worker), and so on.
What do i do? I don't want to see my daughter getting continually hurt because her "friends" are talking poorly about her, but we also do not want to return to that facility!

 

[NJ Coach]

Ignore it. Harder said than done, but it's the only option. Friends will not talk about you, but "friends" will. It's hard to hear that others are bad mouthing your daughter, but jealousy can make people ugly. Don't discount that some of these people may feel betrayed too. A lot of times a gym or team becomes your family, and when someone leaves, you feel hurt or betrayed, and a natural reaction (especially for teenage girls) is to strike out at that. Mob mentality keeps it going.

 

[lakerfantlc]

My daughter is a level 5 cheerleader and decided to tryout for a worlds team about a month ago. She made the most prestigious worlds team at that gym, and she loves it!
After her switch, her old coach talked to her for about an hour, and they both ended up crying. He said she was always welcome back. As much as she loved the coach and gym, it was time for her to move onto a more developed gym.
She thought she had settled things with her old coach, and all was good. This is not the case. My daughters best friend is still on the team, and she repeatedly reports to my daughter that every practice the athletes, along with the coaches bash on my daughter! They say things such as she is lying about making the team she did, making remarks about her work ethic (even though before the coach would always comment on how my daughter was the hardest worker), and so on.
What do i do? I don't want to see my daughter getting continually hurt because her "friends" are talking poorly about her, but we also do not want to return to that facility!

sadly there is nothing you can do...just teach your daughter the lesson about how it feels and NEVER do it to anyone else...thats what I had to do...our old gym still talks bad about us...the director even told a whole team she was going to beat me up...silly and childish but it is what it is....I just have to pray for them and move on....but the more it happens tells you that you made the right decision!!

 

[flcheermom]

Almost the same exact situation occured when we switched gyms 3 years ago... All you can do is realize you are making the best decision for you and your daughter and not worry what others say and do. Who knows, some of the same friends may end up cheering at the same gym, and even the same team down the road...as was our case. You really don't know what may happen in the future or who you may end up cheering with again, so I always say treat people like you want to be treated!... The gyms that promote sportmanship and have coaches that do likewise -continue to grow and win on and off the mat and the gyms that dont lose all the way around.

 

[mybabywantstotumble]

you have to do what is right for you and your cp. i know it's tough switching gyms, we just did it officially yesterday. and it sucks that even though i am sure it is hard enough on you and your cp to start a new year at a new gym and leaving your old friends that people are talking crap. unfortunately it's a competetive sport and they obviously are not only hurt that your cp left the "family" but i am sure are jealous that she made that team.

good luck to you and your cp this season! and come to the parents area where the cool kids hang out.

 

[alexamarysouza]

I agree with njcoach. This same thing happened to me when I left my gym after being there for 7 years. It was a hard move, and not my decision in the first place. After about 3 weeks with my new gym, I started getting reports from my some of my bestfriends saying the girls were talking about me. Saying things like 'she only left because she didn't get put on the team she wanted to be put on', which was incorrect, because I made 2 great teams, and would've rather been level 3 than 4.2, and most of my friends knew that & felt the same way. Later on, some girls that I never really cared for had the nerve to fbook message me and say that my coach, who pretty much helped RAISE me, was talking smack about me as well. They said he called me bad names, and that he was glad I was gone. NOT THE CASE! I see him at comps all the time, he tells me he loves me, and misses me, gives me a hug, and says good luck.2 years ago he saw me at a comp, that his team was in, and told me that my team had it in the bag. And you say he was talking bad about me?!? IGNORE KIDS, THEY LIE!!!!
k, I'm done ranting now lol.

 

[CCuRHOT]

Sometimes the kids that are still at the old gym are very hurt and they make these things up to hurt the one that left. Some may not like that the coach and your daughter still have a good relationship and take things way out of context. I don't know what the case is for your daughter, but this may also be a possibility. I've seen it happen.

 

[stretchyflexi]

I left my old gym that I was a t for 4 years because it wasnt the right fit anymore. I had coaches say rude things about me and I came home crying at least twice a week from practice. I left. At my new gym my old coach has been really rude about it but I desided to follow my heart and I LOVE MY NEW GYM!!

 

[jcheermom]

When we left our old gym after being there for 10 years, they were so bitter and angry that they, as you all are saying, made up stories and, made us look bad. They said we owed them money but the only money that we owed them was the money that we would have had to pay if we had stayed another month. They went so far as to post all of these mean things publicly about CP and she just let them roll right off of her because she was so happy to be gone from that old gym and so thrilled with her new gym. Don't get me wrong, she still missed the people from her old gym, but she was so at peace with being in her new surroundings that nothing else mattered. In fact, for her surprise sweet 16, I invited some of her old teammates and we had heard that the owners had openly said that they were forbidden from attending this event, but there were 4 girls who made the decision to defy the coaches and attend her party and she was thrilled!! Her old coaches will never get over the fact that she left their facility but she made the decision because it was best for her to leave and move on and she will never regret that decision that she made.

 

[xpameggles]

I would ignore it, and then when it gets to competition season, I would post pictures of her tumbling, showing them that she is on that team. Don't direct it to them, just post pictures of her performance. Apparently she was a great cheerleader at her old gym, or else they would have let it go. It's their loss. And they need to stop complaining and bashing your daughter.