All-Star Words Of Advice For Gym Party Reveal

[dawgshow]

Well, we found out tonight that the gym isn't fielding a Mini's team at all this season which immediately placed her on Tiny's. She managed to leave the gym with only a few fallen tears, but cried herself to sleep in the car on the way home. At this point, she's supposed to start practice this week and I've put the ball in her court---I'm not sure she's going to be cheering this year.

Aww...poor little peanut. Can you spin it as she can be the "big kid" on the team and be the leader?

 

[SL&AM]

Aww...poor little peanut. Can you spin it as she can be the "big kid" on the team and be the leader?

I tried that approach, but honestly, that just doesn't work for this particular kid---she really, really doesn't do well in situations where she's the oldest (she struggles in school with this because she had to start a year later because of her birthday and is always the oldest) and I'm sure parents use that type of excuse all the time but I've watched it with her among multiple situations. Her little sister has a special need, and because of that need, she has played the role of surrogate mother (much to my annoyance) since she was virtually 2.5-3---she has always been her leader, the distraction to get people to look away from her, and the one who makes her feel better when she has meltdowns. I largely think that has a lot to do with it, because she's absolutely capable of holding the 'leader' status, but she doesn't want it and cheer is her time to just be herself.

DH asked her against this morning if she was cheering and she told him no. I'll ask her again tomorrow and whatever answer she gives is what I'll go with.

 

[Cheerfun2]

Is there a youth team that is her level? I feel so sad that she is sad!

 

[JumpChannel]

@SL&AM props to your cp for handling a difficult situation gracefully and to you for supporting her

 

[SL&AM]

Is there a youth team that is her level? I feel so sad that she is sad!

They fielded Tiny, Y1-2, S1-3, Sr 5R

 

[quitthedrama]

I tried that approach, but honestly, that just doesn't work for this particular kid---she really, really doesn't do well in situations where she's the oldest (she struggles in school with this because she had to start a year later because of her birthday and is always the oldest) and I'm sure parents use that type of excuse all the time but I've watched it with her among multiple situations. Her little sister has a special need, and because of that need, she has played the role of surrogate mother (much to my annoyance) since she was virtually 2.5-3---she has always been her leader, the distraction to get people to look away from her, and the one who makes her feel better when she has meltdowns. I largely think that has a lot to do with it, because she's absolutely capable of holding the 'leader' status, but she doesn't want it and cheer is her time to just be herself.

DH asked her against this morning if she was cheering and she told him no. I'll ask her again tomorrow and whatever answer she gives is what I'll go with.

This was the one age change I had an issue with. Almost every Tiny team I see at competitions is so very basic and with a range of ages as low as 3, I can't imagine how boring and frustrating practices must be to a 6 year old. I really don't blame your CP for being upset and not wanting to cheer. At age 6, they are old enough to "get it" and see what the older kids are doing and want to do the same thing. They don't need 12 second 8-counts and a coach sitting in front of them doing every move with them. Most mini routines have the same flow as the older divisions, but Tiny teams rarely do.

 

[SL&AM]

This was the one age change I had an issue with. Almost every Tiny team I see at competitions is so very basic and with a range of ages as low as 3, I can't imagine how boring and frustrating practices must be to a 6 year old. I really don't blame your CP for being upset and not wanting to cheer. At age 6, they are old enough to "get it" and see what the older kids are doing and want to do the same thing. They don't need 12 second 8-counts and a coach sitting in front of them doing every move with them. Most mini routines have the same flow as the older divisions, but Tiny teams rarely do.

Yeah, I really don't get why they changed the Tiny age group. Obviously I wasn't there to hear the arguments for it and if a gym owner/coach wants to come chime in one any reason why this was a good idea, I'm all ears.

Yesterday at the meeting before reveal, once I saw there wasn't a Mini team I knew where she was placed especially after the owner drilled in that they place by age, place by age, place by age. Which I respect, to a degree, however, this gym doesn't always have a Tiny LVL 1 team that competes---they are known for having a Tiny Exhibition team. If I find out it's exhibition, my desire to pay for it is over. I like this gym, I like the coaches, but I don't want my 7 year old in a sport where everyone wins---that was the original appeal of all-star cheer and why I let her start when she was 4.

I don't know, the more I think about it the more I have reasons on each side why she should just take a year off, maybe do some tumbling classes, and try something else---if she comes to me tomorrow and says absolutely yes, I'll bite my tongue, pay for it, and suck it up. I definitely appreciate this board right now; I'm definitely not the mom to bring my frustration to the gym, and ya'll are my sounding board who get it. DH saw the red face, puffy eyes, and her entire demeanor towards cheer change and I'm not even sure he gets it.

 

[Momager]

Yeah, I really don't get why they changed the Tiny age group. Obviously I wasn't there to hear the arguments for it and if a gym owner/coach wants to come chime in one any reason why this was a good idea, I'm all ears.

Yesterday at the meeting before reveal, once I saw there wasn't a Mini team I knew where she was placed especially after the owner drilled in that they place by age, place by age, place by age. Which I respect, to a degree, however, this gym doesn't always have a Tiny LVL 1 team that competes---they are known for having a Tiny Exhibition team. If I find out it's exhibition, my desire to pay for it is over. I like this gym, I like the coaches, but I don't want my 7 year old in a sport where everyone wins---that was the original appeal of all-star cheer and why I let her start when she was 4.

I don't know, the more I think about it the more I have reasons on each side why she should just take a year off, maybe do some tumbling classes, and try something else---if she comes to me tomorrow and says absolutely yes, I'll bite my tongue, pay for it, and suck it up. I definitely appreciate this board right now; I'm definitely not the mom to bring my frustration to the gym, and ya'll are my sounding board who get it. DH saw the red face, puffy eyes, and her entire demeanor towards cheer change and I'm not even sure he gets it.

I think you had said earlier that you didn't want to change gyms? Is there a rec program where she could cheer for a season while still taking tumbling classes at your gym? Pop Warner or something to give her a different cheer experience while waiting to age up into an all star team that meets her needs? My baby has a late birthday too and there have been lots of struggles along the way. Sometimes you just have to take a different path.

 

[SL&AM]

I think you had said earlier that you didn't want to change gyms? Is there a rec program where she could cheer for a season while still taking tumbling classes at your gym? Pop Warner or something to give her a different cheer experience while waiting to age up into an all star team that meets her needs? My baby has a late birthday too and there have been lots of struggles along the way. Sometimes you just have to take a different path.

It's not that I won't switch gyms, the only other 'local' gym has a sketchy safety past where one of my own family members got hurt as the result of a poor tumbling coach that come to find out shouldn't have been spotting her to begin with. If we looked outside of the county, there are a few other options but the last time I brought it up to her she wasn't interested in the long drives (about 1.5 hours)--if she ultimately says no tomorrow, I'll remind her that we can look towards the bigger city and see what she says.

As for rec, yes it's an option that I'll present to her once I figure out all the details myself (I was researching it when this message came through).

 

[mamabear]

As for rec, yes it's an option that I'll present to her once I figure out all the details myself (I was researching it when this message came through).

Don't forget to look and see if there is a local AYC (American Youth Football and Cheer) team too. I can't rave enough about my experience with that organization.

Have you talked with the owners and let them know your feelings? I know it can be uncomfortable to do, especially if you fear being labeled as an SM; but in the long run you are usually the only one who will advocate for your kid. Letting them know the reasoning about why being forced into another leadership role might not be the best for her and let them know that you are ready to commit to whatever is needed to help her succeed on a youth team. They might say no, but at least you tried. They might also say, 'let's give it a try". Maybe they will meet you half way and let her train as an alternate, so she will still be challenged.

 

[SL&AM]

Don't forget to look and see if there is a local AYC (American Youth Football and Cheer) team too. I can't rave enough about my experience with that organization.

Have you talked with the owners and let them know your feelings? I know it can be uncomfortable to do, especially if you fear being labeled as an SM; but in the long wrong you are usually the only one who will advocate for your kid. Letting them know the reasoning about why being forced into another leadership role might not be the best for her and let them know that you are ready to commit to whatever is needed to help her succeed on a youth team. They might say no, but at least you tried. They might also say, 'let's give it a try". Maybe they will meet you half way and let her train as an alternate, so she will still be challenged.

I'll check to see if we have that here.

Not yet, but it's not out of the question.

 

[Ren]

@SL&AM Sounds like you're in a tough situation. Not sure there's really anything I can do to help, as I don't really know much about all the different types of cheer, outside of allstar. Only thing I could suggest is have you looked into gymnastics for a year if there is a good facility near you? Otherwise, I just wanted to say I hope you get something worked out for your CP :kiss:

 

[notimeforthat]

I think you have a reasonable request and your gym owners should consider your side.
I would keep it very positive and make sure you tell the owners how much your daughter loves the gym, the coaches etc.
I would say that cp benefited from the past 2 years of the introductory team and is really looking forward to the next chapter... If numbers are an issue perhaps CP could help out the tinys while also being on a youth?
Gym owners dont want to loose young kids that may stay 10 years plus. I understand age first bit in your case ( as long as her attention span will allow) I don't see it unreasonable to ask.

 

[FTSP]

Yeah, I really don't get why they changed the Tiny age group. Obviously I wasn't there to hear the arguments for it and if a gym owner/coach wants to come chime in one any reason why this was a good idea, I'm all ears.

Yesterday at the meeting before reveal, once I saw there wasn't a Mini team I knew where she was placed especially after the owner drilled in that they place by age, place by age, place by age. Which I respect, to a degree, however, this gym doesn't always have a Tiny LVL 1 team that competes---they are known for having a Tiny Exhibition team. If I find out it's exhibition, my desire to pay for it is over. I like this gym, I like the coaches, but I don't want my 7 year old in a sport where everyone wins---that was the original appeal of all-star cheer and why I let her start when she was 4.

I don't know, the more I think about it the more I have reasons on each side why she should just take a year off, maybe do some tumbling classes, and try something else---if she comes to me tomorrow and says absolutely yes, I'll bite my tongue, pay for it, and suck it up. I definitely appreciate this board right now; I'm definitely not the mom to bring my frustration to the gym, and ya'll are my sounding board who get it. DH saw the red face, puffy eyes, and her entire demeanor towards cheer change and I'm not even sure he gets it.

With AYC , at least where I coach, she would be on Division 8. Those girls do everything the older girls do,within the rules, and are eligible to compete and try to get to Nationals in Orlando. It might be a good comprise for this year. If that is the route you go I would just start saving for Nationals because our regionals are like the week before so flights can be a bit expensive.

 

[SL&AM]

With AYC , at least where I coach, she would be on Division 8. Those girls do everything the older girls do,within the rules, and are eligible to compete and try to get to Nationals in Orlando. It might be a good comprise for this year. If that is the route you go I would just start saving for Nationals because our regionals are like the week before so flights can be a bit expensive.

Is it all done in Orlando? We're driving distance.