All-Star When To Walk Away

[Helen uk uni cheer]

So I posted this on 18+ but I need some advice

So had a cheer competition on sunday and it while my team did the best routine and paces 2nd I didn't have the best day. I am ashamed to say I had a meltdown but i tried to keep it as private as possible but one of my coaches told me team which I wasnt best pleased about. One of the things I was annoyed about is I was the only one not in a uniform as apparently they couldn't find an old one as no one has a new uniform yet. I was upset because its not nice to stand out for the wrong reasons and ym coach went "but the boys wear black" they are no boys on the senior team I am on and I am not a boy!! another one was its only a small comp so it doesnt matter.

I was stressed enough with other stuff and I am really not enjoying cheer any more as I am not challenged I have been given the option to leave now before the end of season but don't want to let my team down and I really don't know what to do

Also I am trying to be a better athlete but I am bored and I am sick of paying my fees on time when lots are not
I just don't know what to do till the end of season after that I am trying out else where

 

[oncecoolcoachnowmom]

Some things to think about:

*Are you just stressed about life in general? Sometimes, people think the problem is the gym, when in reality they'd be stressed ANYWHERE because that's what cheering and going to school is. Stressful at times.

*Is your stress over something that is temporary? Ex: The uniform issue can be fixed. Other things may not change over time.

*You said you were upset about the results. Would you be happy if you left your gym for another and the result was still the same? You can move gyms and still come in 2nd all the time.

*What are your goals? If you're cheering for FUN, great. However, if you're looking to be a Worlds athlete or Level 5, ask yourself if your current gym will challenge you enough to get there?

 

[Belinda]

I know the european season is in full swing(my teams competes nationals on saturday and then we're done), so I totally understand how you feel about walking out now. How many comps do you have left, and how many monthly fees? We've had three athletes and two alternates quit our team this season, one was during the fall, but she came back in like january, one kinda faded out late fall/early spring, and one quit straight after regionals. And while it's not fun, we survived. We redid our routine and did amazing at jamfest. It's not optimal to quit mid-season but if you really can't stick it out anymore I'd say leave. It won't benefit your team if your head and heart isn't 100% there.

 

[Helen uk uni cheer]

Some things to think about:

*Are you just stressed about life in general? Sometimes, people think the problem is the gym, when in reality they'd be stressed ANYWHERE because that's what cheering and going to school is. Stressful at times.

*Is your stress over something that is temporary? Ex: The uniform issue can be fixed. Other things may not change over time.

*You said you were upset about the results. Would you be happy if you left your gym for another and the result was still the same? You can move gyms and still come in 2nd all the time.

*What are your goals? If you're cheering for FUN, great. However, if you're looking to be a Worlds athlete or Level 5, ask yourself if your current gym will challenge you enough to get there?

Wording of my post I was happy to come 2nd it was great result however the mentality of the gym is if we place well great but we don't have the tools to be truly competitive when we go to big comps. I like to be competitive and be pushed which isnt happening we don't tumble at practice which is an issue as I live no where near a somewhere to tumble.

Realistically I will never be worlds athlete but want to reach my potential and be pushed not having to let my coaches know a stunt is illegal they say its fine then get a safety because it was illegal

I think I am stressed because I don't feel part of the team I live 1hr away and most go to school together and apart from 1 other the are alot younger than me on senior 1 but on senior 3 they are more my age but the levels don't really mix

The uniform situation I was upset because I felt like an idiot and I have paid £115 for a uniform I will wear once

 

[Helen uk uni cheer]

I know the european season is in full swing(my teams competes nationals on saturday and then we're done), so I totally understand how you feel about walking out now. How many comps do you have left, and how many monthly fees? We've had three athletes and two alternates quit our team this season, one was during the fall, but she came back in like january, one kinda faded out late fall/early spring, and one quit straight after regionals. And while it's not fun, we survived. We redid our routine and did amazing at jamfest. It's not optimal to quit mid-season but if you really can't stick it out anymore I'd say leave. It won't benefit your team if your head and heart isn't 100% there.

I have one comp left in july maybe 2 if we get a european summit bid. and I have £137 pounds to pay for nationals and 3 months tuition I don't have to pay the £137 if I dont compete. I go up and down in mood about it I have been open to my coach about next season because the people on their own are nice I just want to progress but what does it show the prospective team if I quit mid season?

 

[Belinda]

I have one comp left in july maybe 2 if we get a european summit bid. and I have £137 pounds to pay for nationals and 3 months tuition I don't have to pay the £137 if I dont compete. I go up and down in mood about it I have been open to my coach about next season because the people on their own are nice I just want to progress but what does it show the prospective team if I quit mid season?

well 137 is a hefty price for not being satisfied. i assume it's including travel and hotel? otherwise that's just a hefty price in general. i'm not sure what "gym" you're at and where you'll go. but do the two communicate alot? otherwise the new team you make might not know/care you didn't stick it out with your old team. and if anyone asks, just be honest and say you didn't feel at home there, and that you didn't feel challenged, and that's why you wanted to change, to be challenged and be a part of that family. i'm sure they'll understand! if you want to keep up, maybe ask them to make you an alternate, so you can still be there at practice but won't have to compete? though if you paid £115 for your uni, you might wanna use it at least once. ugh, i feel for you in this situation, there's no right or wrong answer.

 

[Helen uk uni cheer]

well 137 is a hefty price for not being satisfied. i assume it's including travel and hotel? otherwise that's just a hefty price in general. i'm not sure what "gym" you're at and where you'll go. but do the two communicate alot? otherwise the new team you make might not know/care you didn't stick it out with your old team. and if anyone asks, just be honest and say you didn't feel at home there, and that you didn't feel challenged, and that's why you wanted to change, to be challenged and be a part of that family. i'm sure they'll understand! if you want to keep up, maybe ask them to make you an alternate, so you can still be there at practice but won't have to compete? though if you paid £115 for your uni, you might wanna use it at least once. ugh, i feel for you in this situation, there's no right or wrong answer.

The gym I'm at now is very small at 30 athletes and the new one is a rival gym which is huge so I think they do talk. They might be an option to compete at new gym for nationals but i think it would ruffle too many feathers for my liking. I'm just torn because of the money I have spent and the commitment of traveling 50 miles one way to practice each week

 

[WinstonsGirl]

I was in a similar situation last season. I'm a Worlds level athlete who wasn't on a Worlds team and I was bored to tears. I pay to be pushed and to become a better athlete. Skill wise, coaching wise, I wasn't getting anything I wanted out of it. I also didn't feel like a part of the team as many of the girls were waiting for me to go back to the Worlds team and told me so (even though I signed up to do this team).

Anyway, I began to treat the season as going to the minor leagues from the NHL (hockey). I used the season not to push myself but to stay in shape and ready for tryouts this season. I focused on my tumbling as that was one area I could still push myself. I almost walked at one point, which until this year, I would never have considered ever.

Personally, if you only have 2 more competition, in a month, I'd stick it out. You'll stay in shape for next season and you won't be leaving your team hanging. That said, if you're going to be miserable at practice, your team will notice and they would be better off potentially without you. But if you use this last month to focus on getting better for next year, that might get you through the rest of this season.

 

[Helen uk uni cheer]

I was in a similar situation last season. I'm a Worlds level athlete who wasn't on a Worlds team and I was bored to tears. I pay to be pushed and to become a better athlete. Skill wise, coaching wise, I wasn't getting anything I wanted out of it. I also didn't feel like a part of the team as many of the girls were waiting for me to go back to the Worlds team and told me so (even though I signed up to do this team).

Anyway, I began to treat the season as going to the minor leagues from the NHL (hockey). I used the season not to push myself but to stay in shape and ready for tryouts this season. I focused on my tumbling as that was one area I could still push myself. I almost walked at one point, which until this year, I would never have considered ever.

Personally, if you only have 2 more competition, in a month, I'd stick it out. You'll stay in shape for next season and you won't be leaving your team hanging. That said, if you're going to be miserable at practice, your team will notice and they would be better off potentially without you. But if you use this last month to focus on getting better for next year, that might get you through the rest of this season.

For me I haven't got tumbling but I can back up to level3 I'm on senior 1 and im just bored I am trying to get my back flexibility better but we don't really practice tumbling during practice and there are no tumble classes

I think I'm going to stick it out I spoke to my coaches and my family is going on vacation for 2 weeks so I am having a break away which if I am honest I think I just need to recharge

There have been other issues as well which is why I want to go to a bigger gym but I think it will be ok I just don't want to be put in the position again at nationals where I stood out for all the wrong reasons because they couldn't organise things

 

[SL&AM]

For me I haven't got tumbling but I can back up to level3 I'm on senior 1 and im just bored I am trying to get my back flexibility better but we don't really practice tumbling during practice and there are no tumble classes

I think I'm going to stick it out I spoke to my coaches and my family is going on vacation for 2 weeks so I am having a break away which if I am honest I think I just need to recharge

There have been other issues as well which is why I want to go to a bigger gym but I think it will be ok I just don't want to be put in the position again at nationals where I stood out for all the wrong reasons because they couldn't organise things

I think a break sounds like a good idea. I know when I'm in situations where it's always stress, stress, stress, my desire to just throw up my hands and walk away only grows until I either take a break or actually do it.

Since your season is close to over and you've already paid for your uniform, I'd compete in it so at least it has happy memories attached to it.

I know you've struggles with finding places to cheer, and I hope next season you're able to find a better fit. (((HUGS)))

 

[WinstonsGirl]

For me I haven't got tumbling but I can back up to level3 I'm on senior 1 and im just bored I am trying to get my back flexibility better but we don't really practice tumbling during practice and there are no tumble classes

I think I'm going to stick it out I spoke to my coaches and my family is going on vacation for 2 weeks so I am having a break away which if I am honest I think I just need to recharge

There have been other issues as well which is why I want to go to a bigger gym but I think it will be ok I just don't want to be put in the position again at nationals where I stood out for all the wrong reasons because they couldn't organise things

I totally agree that you should switch gyms, after what happened this past weekend. And as for tumbling, it was just an example of what I used to keep myself motivated when nothing else did. Let us know how tryouts go at the new gym.

 

[Helen uk uni cheer]

Thanks for all the advice. I going to practice on sunday to see how I go then going on vacation for 2 weeks. I am going to stick it out. I got coaching credentialed up to level 2 because I was having to spot things so I can now do it safely so I am going help the girls on my team and also try and find some place to tumble.

I am going to have to travel 2 hours for cheer next season but I hoping it is a better fit I spoke to parents as a comp I went to and they seem nice with some people my age.

 

[alexamarysouza]

I was in a similar situation many years ago. Not the whole uniform business, but rather being surrounded by some negativity and not having a challenge anymore. Luckily for me, the issues didn't really arise until the season ended when I was released and could attend another gym. But even if it had been during the season, I would've stuck it out for the greater good of the team. (Which I read you've already decided to do, which is great.)
But at the end of the season...do what's best for you. If you aren't enjoying it anymore, try and find a place that will give you that passion back...I had to do that. And it's hard leaving friends and all, but sometimes you just have to find somewhere that will remind you why you started. A place that will give you a challenge. And if you can't find that place, maybe just take a break. You might be able to find that you'll be your happiest focusing on other things in your life!
Good luck!!

 

[Labegg]

Don't quit team before the season is over...it's poor sportsmanship, not to mention rude. But by all means find a more suitable situation for yourself next season.

 

[Ashley]

For me I haven't got tumbling but I can back up to level3 I'm on senior 1 and im just bored I am trying to get my back flexibility better but we don't really practice tumbling during practice and there are no tumble classes

I think I'm going to stick it out I spoke to my coaches and my family is going on vacation for 2 weeks so I am having a break away which if I am honest I think I just need to recharge

There have been other issues as well which is why I want to go to a bigger gym but I think it will be ok I just don't want to be put in the position again at nationals where I stood out for all the wrong reasons because they couldn't organise things

I wish you the best of luck. Just know that even at a bigger gym you're not guaranteed to make a higher level team, especially if your tumbling isn't at the level of the team you want to be on.