All-Star Advice To Gym Moms....

[Mom2Cheergirls]

Okay 2 bits of advice: both I would have loved to share but bit my tongue.

1) If your child tells you they don't like cheer and they don't want to do it. Pushing them to do private lessons and come to every open gym is probably not going to help. Not every child will like every sport and just because you are REALLY in to it, does not mean your child will. Maybe in a couple of years your child will want to try it again or maybe they just have too much of it an don't want their whole childhood to be centered around it.

2) If you are paying for private lessons and your child is goofing off and being disrespectful and the coach has tried to handle it but asks for your support -- don't tell them it is okay for your kids to goof off that you are paying them and they just have to deal, and then go back and laugh about it in the parent room. Coaches deserve respect you may be paying them but you are paying them to instruct your child not babysit. It just paints your kid and you in a bad light -- look around your the only one thinking it is funny.

 

[12stepCheermom]

These threads always astound me. When in the history of parenting has any mom ever taken unsolicited advice on how to parent THEIR child, and followed it??? I know I haven't. I parent my kids how I think I should, not how you think I should.

Sorry. Just something that gets under my skin on here - I never understand the constant need people have to point out what all the other moms are doing wrong.

Thank you ever so much for this! There is ONE person who knows what my kid needs and that's me. I don't coach my kid. I only parrot what the coaches have said. I don't argue placement, I tell them if they dont like it to work harder. I have about 10 personalities with my daughter because only I know which one to use and when to use it...and yes, sometimes that's to rip her a new one at water break because she understands my expectations. I don't care if all you have is a cartwheel and you'll never be able to do a forward roll....you better give me 110% of effort. I also know with my son I can't use practically any of those. I can ONLY be positive and supportive because he tears himself up enough and if I'm jumping him, it's to get him to back off himself.

The only time I tear her up is when she's being a slacker at practice (which happens very infrequently) or if she s being anything less that 100% positive to her teammates at all times. hell get that from me too, but outside of stretching at home, I don't have to jump either of their cases for that practically at all.

I am the friendly mom, I am the one who invites people and welcomes folks to our gym. I do answer questions. I am the PR. But my kids grew up like a lot of us did where the coach is always right and the kid is always wrong first. I never take their word first and I've never needed to because I don't drop and shop. I stay and watch so when they ask, why am I in the third row when my jumps are higher than Susie's ..I can say, because you transition to the BACK of the mat directly after jumps to throw that sick basket in the beginning of running tumbling. If you were at the front, you wouldn't be able to get there in time. It's not that your jumps are bad...they just need you at the back for the next thing so you're toward the back so you can get there.

I wouldn't be able to rationalize coaches decisions for them if I didn't pay attention and use some common sense and a great big dose of "my kid is NOT a cheerlebrity" and if she's asking me something I don't know....I say...I don't know...go ask your coach.

These threads drive me nuts if only because I feel like every thread about moms turns into nothing but bashing moms. I'm a mom. I'm exceptionally involved and to date the only thing her coaches have said to me is..."why cant every mom be like you!?"

We're not all the spawn of hell.

 

[cupieqt]

Hahahaha! I have to do knives upside down and forks right side up. No idea why, I just have to. But what is this thing you speak of..."cp unloads dishwasher"?

yea I like forks right side up too but when cp was doing her ONE chore (outside of cleaning her room) she decided dramatic hysterics were an appropriate reaction to a poke from a fork. I told the little diva to suck it up

 

[CD FOREVER AND EVA!]

Sorry I know this is off topic but you have just mentioned one of the things that really really pushes my buttons. Why has our society progressed to the point that we have to have 9 year olds "choose" which sport she wants to concentrate on?

I am so happy when I hear parents, like yourself, say "hey, wait a minute, my kid does not need to pick A sport, she can be good at more than one thing and maybe 'a' sport actually improves her skills for 'b' sport." Good for you!

More parents, especially those parents of that kid that specialized and only does one sport, need to recognize everyone can contribute to the team, if the coach picks my kid to make the team, you shouldn't be the one questioning whether she is "good enough" or "dedicated enough".

Thank you ... I appreciate that ... I make the schedules work and she goes from one sport to the other ... us parents sacrafice so that our kids can do the things we didn't get to do ... I changed my hours and I drive all over the place so she can do both

Thank goodness they are only 15 minutes from each other and both 10 minutes from my house

 

[12stepCheermom]

yea I like forks right side up too but when cp was doing her ONE chore (outside of cleaning her room) she decided dramatic hysterics were an appropriate reaction to a poke from a fork. I told the little diva to suck it up

Bahahahaha! Our gym owner had the BEST comment for my son EVER at practice and this totally reminded me of it...

My son was whining about something (minor whining really at the end of practice...I think the an ab circuit killed him or something) and they're in a team huddle when he was lamenting. Keith says, "oh, I'm so sorry about that. You okay? Yes? Okay? How about this...I can help you out, should I run down to the McDonald's so you can get a super size straw to suck it up?"

I died laughing! It was epic. Even my son laughed along with the rest of the team.

Classic line.

 

[Just-a-Mom]

I don't care if all you have is a cartwheel and you'll never be able to do a forward roll....you better give me 110% of effort.

These threads drive me nuts if only because I feel like every thread about moms turns into nothing but bashing moms. I'm a mom. I'm exceptionally involved and to date the only thing her coaches have said to me is..."why cant every mom be like you!?"

We're not all the spawn of hell.

The first part reminds me of a quote I always tell my kids about doing your best at whatever it is you do - "Never be ashamed of your job - if you flip burger, you flip the best d@mn burger anyone's ever had!" Could be used for cheer - "Never be ashamed of your level - if your top skill is a forward roll, make it the fiercest forward roll your little body can do!"

As for the latter part - I think that's why I always get my feathers ruffled as soon as these threads pop up. Because I've been on here long enough to know that by the end of the first page the thread has gotten down to just posts bashing moms. I very rarely see positive posts about parents on here - mostly it's stuff about how we live vicariously through our kids, hound coaches about team placements or spots in the routine, push our kids relentlessly, mash our noses up against the window and scream through it, and on and on about how we're all crazy, obsessive people with no lives of our own other than to harass our kids and their coaches into mental breakdown. But the truth of the matter is in all our years of cheer I've probably met less than 10 moms like this.

Most of the moms I know are normal moms who worry about whether cp will move up, how cp will feel about it, whether cp is giving his/her all at practice, and whether cp still likes cheer. For about the first 5 minutes of practice. Then we talk about husbands, vacations, work, how sick cp was that one time, 50 Shades of Grey , and how in the he!! we are going to scrape together enough money to pay for all this travel. I've made some really good, non-crazy friends who I never would have met at Starbucks.

 

[cupieqt]

Bahahahaha! Our gym owner had the BEST comment for my son EVER at practice and this totally reminded me of it...

My son was whining about something (minor whining really at the end of practice...I think the an ab circuit killed him or something) and they're in a team huddle when he was lamenting. Keith says, "oh, I'm so sorry about that. You okay? Yes? Okay? How about this...I can help you out, should I run down to the McDonald's so you can get a super size straw to suck it up?"

I died laughing! It was epic. Even my son laughed along with the rest of the team.

Classic line.

Oh I cannot WAIT to use that one!! Awesome.

 

[12stepCheermom]

The first part reminds me of a quote I always tell my kids about doing your best at whatever it is you do - "Never be ashamed of your job - if you flip burger, you flip the best d@mn burger anyone's ever had!" Could be used for cheer - "Never be ashamed of your level - if your top skill is a forward roll, make it the fiercest forward roll your little body can do!"

As for the latter part - I think that's why I always get my feathers ruffled as soon as these threads pop up. Because I've been on here long enough to know that by the end of the first page the thread has gotten down to just posts bashing moms. I very rarely see positive posts about parents on here - mostly it's stuff about how we live vicariously through our kids, hound coaches about team placements or spots in the routine, push our kids relentlessly, mash our noses up against the window and scream through it, and on and on about how we're all crazy, obsessive people with no lives of our own other than to harass our kids and their coaches into mental breakdown. But the truth of the matter is in all our years of cheer I've probably met less than 10 moms like this.

Most of the moms I know are normal moms who worry about whether cp will move up, how cp will feel about it, whether cp is giving his/her all at practice, and whether cp still likes cheer. For about the first 5 minutes of practice. Then we talk about husbands, vacations, work, how sick cp was that one time, 50 Shades of Grey , and how in the he!! we are going to scrape together enough money to pay for all this travel. I've made some really good, non-crazy friends who I never would have met at Starbucks.

Absolutely shimmied to infinity.

 

[allstarmom#1]

The first part reminds me of a quote I always tell my kids about doing your best at whatever it is you do - "Never be ashamed of your job - if you flip burger, you flip the best d@mn burger anyone's ever had!" Could be used for cheer - "Never be ashamed of your level - if your top skill is a forward roll, make it the fiercest forward roll your little body can do!"

As for the latter part - I think that's why I always get my feathers ruffled as soon as these threads pop up. Because I've been on here long enough to know that by the end of the first page the thread has gotten down to just posts bashing moms. I very rarely see positive posts about parents on here - mostly it's stuff about how we live vicariously through our kids, hound coaches about team placements or spots in the routine, push our kids relentlessly, mash our noses up against the window and scream through it, and on and on about how we're all crazy, obsessive people with no lives of our own other than to harass our kids and their coaches into mental breakdown. But the truth of the matter is in all our years of cheer I've probably met less than 10 moms like this.

Most of the moms I know are normal moms who worry about whether cp will move up, how cp will feel about it, whether cp is giving his/her all at practice, and whether cp still likes cheer. For about the first 5 minutes of practice. Then we talk about husbands, vacations, work, how sick cp was that one time, 50 Shades of Grey , and how in the he!! we are going to scrape together enough money to pay for all this travel. I've made some really good, non-crazy friends who I never would have met at Starbucks.

 

[RaRaMama]

The first part reminds me of a quote I always tell my kids about doing your best at whatever it is you do - "Never be ashamed of your job - if you flip burger, you flip the best d@mn burger anyone's ever had!" Could be used for cheer - "Never be ashamed of your level - if your top skill is a forward roll, make it the fiercest forward roll your little body can do!"

As for the latter part - I think that's why I always get my feathers ruffled as soon as these threads pop up. Because I've been on here long enough to know that by the end of the first page the thread has gotten down to just posts bashing moms. I very rarely see positive posts about parents on here - mostly it's stuff about how we live vicariously through our kids, hound coaches about team placements or spots in the routine, push our kids relentlessly, mash our noses up against the window and scream through it, and on and on about how we're all crazy, obsessive people with no lives of our own other than to harass our kids and their coaches into mental breakdown. But the truth of the matter is in all our years of cheer I've probably met less than 10 moms like this.

Most of the moms I know are normal moms who worry about whether cp will move up, how cp will feel about it, whether cp is giving his/her all at practice, and whether cp still likes cheer. For about the first 5 minutes of practice. Then we talk about husbands, vacations, work, how sick cp was that one time, 50 Shades of Grey , and how in the he!! we are going to scrape together enough money to pay for all this travel. I've made some really good, non-crazy friends who I never would have met at Starbucks.

Shimmy to infinity and beyond This is so true. We made the move to Maryland a few years ago and we were definitely having a difficult time finding our niche. If it wasn't for our gym and some of these "cheer moms" I dont know that we ever would have. All of the moms I'm friends with just want their kid (and my kid for that matter) to succeed....I'm sure there are some of the insane cheer moms at every gym, but I believe they are the exception, not the rule.

 

[ufomom]

My advice is to hold your children close and cherish them so that you have no regrets because life can change on a dime.

 

[cheermeup]

I don't sign my kid up for privates, that's how I afforded the iPad.

I love our 1 hour drive, we talk about everything. How practice went, what she's working on, the Circus Afro video on you tube, how she has improved, school, her future, boys, bullying, it's our time. I'll never complain about the drive because it's my favorite part.

 

[tumbleyoda]

Okay 2 bits of advice: both I would have loved to share but bit my tongue.

1) If your child tells you they don't like cheer and they don't want to do it. Pushing them to do private lessons and come to every open gym is probably not going to help. Not every child will like every sport and just because you are REALLY in to it, does not mean your child will. Maybe in a couple of years your child will want to try it again or maybe they just have too much of it an don't want their whole childhood to be centered around it.

2) If you are paying for private lessons and your child is goofing off and being disrespectful and the coach has tried to handle it but asks for your support -- don't tell them it is okay for your kids to goof off that you are paying them and they just have to deal, and then go back and laugh about it in the parent room. Coaches deserve respect you may be paying them but you are paying them to instruct your child not babysit. It just paints your kid and you in a bad light -- look around your the only one thinking it is funny.

Agree.

When it come to privates, if your child does not want to work after a couple of lessons, I will give you your money back and stop the privates. I will allow one "I'm having a bad day" goof off private but that is it. Most of the kids and parents I have worked with tell me my privates are harder than those they have taken with other coaches cause I actually make them work the thirty minutes. We have fun, but we are going to work too. I refuse to take any parents hard earned money if their child does not want to put the effort into the lesson. I have enough kids that want that spot than to to just watch any kid goof off for thirty minutes. I would rather it be productive for all of us.

 

[cheermeup]

So obnoxious but I laugh every time.

 

[yojaehs]

My gym has every type of cheer parent that there is, so my advice to all parents is #1 do your research. I am a firm believer that if you do your research then you will trust the actions of the gym in all aspects. I tell my parents all the time that I am open to talk at anytime (that I'm not coaching) just know that I will never mention another childs name when discussing theirs and that I will tell them the truth (often times this deters the phone calls lol.) So my advice to parents is DO YOUR RESEARCH, this will fix many problems before they have a chance to start!
Cheers!